Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong
by Phoenix Hoshika
Summary: A fierce battle leaves Edward Elric the Fullmetal Alchemist on the edge of death but before he breathes his last breath he will return his brother to his original body. The process is successfully completed but at what cost?
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note (A/N): Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong is a work of my own mind, except for the characters and the Hagaren world in general. Still, much of it is based on material presented in Arakawa-san's manga, Hagane no Renkinjutsuhi, therefore while tangled up in my own plot and story development there will be spoilers upon spoilers in this fan fiction. To avoid possibly being ruined run! Or take the chance and read on. I know you want to.

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By; Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter One:

When Alchemy Goes Terribly, TERRIBLY Wrong Part A

Human kind can not gain anything without sacrificing something equivalent in value. This is the root principle of Alchemy but the in an attempt to resurrect their dead mother the Elric brothers, Edward and Alphonse, ignored this law and committed the forbidden act of alchemy on a human being. The attempt to bring back their dead mother failed miserably and the rebound cost Edward his left leg and his younger brother, Alphonse, nearly lost his life. Only by sacrificing himself was Edward able to anchor his younger brother's spirit to a nearby suit of armor; this second human transmutation cost Edward his right arm. Despite the tragedy that befell them Edward will not rest until he restores his brother to flesh and blood and the two limbs that he lost. With the only possible way to access such information on how to do so is by becoming an alchemist certified by the state, Edward undergoes the excruciatingly painful of surgery of attaching mechanical limbs to his body called automail in order to freely move around and heads to Central to take the military exam to become a State Alchemist.

Knowing what they could loose by performing another human transmutation, upon receiving his certification Edward returns to his home town of Resembool to burn down the house he and his brother inherited when his mother died and the two brothers set off on their quest to return to their original bodies…

"Brother! Brother, please say something!" Alphonse cried as he held his bleeding older brother in his arms. The two brothers had just won an epic battle against an extremely powerful Homunculus who called himself Sky. They're current location; deep in an underground city inhabited by human chimera and homunculus, a city only wrote of in the most obscure books buried deep in the archives at Central Library and even there only hinted at as if it were a place that only existed in a fairy tale. It would have been dark all around them if it weren't for the soft yellow orange glow of the transmutation circle the two brothers were in the middle of. Sky had managed to mortally wound Edward and was just about to use him as a sacrifice to create a Philosopher's Stone when Alphonse used his alchemic skills to repeatedly burn the Homunculus where he stood until his body was nothing but a pile of ash on the ground.

"Al…" Edward weakly said opening his eyes and looking up at the suit of armor that was his brother through blurred vision. "I'm going to use this transmutation circle to amplify my power, so… so you can go back to your normal body."

"But how, what are you going to use for the equivalent trade?" Al questioned in a frantic voice.

"Myself." Edward answered.

"No, you can't I won't allow it!" Alphonse said sternly as he continued to watch his brother bleed in his steel arms. "I'm getting you out of here and to a hospital."

"Damn it, listen!" Edward said sitting up which only made him dizzy causing him to fall backward again."

"Brother!" Al shouted.

"I'm alright… as can expected to be for a dead man." Edward said weakly giving his younger brother a slight smile. "I'm changing you back now, while there's still life in me to trade he said clapping his hands together then letting his left hand fall down upon the transmutation circle. The room filled with a brilliant white light and all Alphonse could do was watch as the light consumed everything. If only he hand arms that could feel then he'd know if his brothers body was still there or gone, taken away in equivalent trade. The light continued to grow in intensity and despite not having eyes made of flesh that could be hurt by the brightness of it Alphonse found himself overwhelmed and then suddenly everything in his path of vision went black. Was he unconscious? Was he dead? Alphonse didn't know which he was until he opened his eyes. He was still inside the transmutation circle but something was different. He could feel the dirt on the ground and how the pieces of brown gravel irritated his bare skin. He could smell the stillness in the air and hear the hollowness of the caverns, and see the soft yellow orange light that illuminated them. Suddenly a rush a panic sweep over him and he inhaled deeply as he sat up. "Brother!" He shouted looking around then sawaa body laying face down some meters away still within the transmutation circle. He tried standing but his knees gave away and he found himself hurriedly crawling toward the body on the ground. "Brother?" Alphonse called again not sure if the person was dead or alive. Carefully placing his hand on their back he could feel them slowly breathing in and out. A wide smile lit up Alphonse's face and he started shaking the person's body. "Brother, Edward!" Alphonse called excitedly. "Brother, wake up!" Alphonse called as he turned the body face up. "Brother is it really you?" Alphonse asked as he held the person in his arms with a concerned expression on his face.

"What? Al?" They said upon opening their eyes. "You're back to normal again and so am I…" Edward smiled as he brought both hands to Alphonse's face and seeing that they were both flesh and blood.

"Isn't it wonderful?" Alphonse said as tears streamed down his face. "I can feel you touching me. I can feel you hands touching me!" Alphonse exclaimed.

"Who'd figure it really work out this time?" Edward said bringing his hands back down. "Though I wonder what could have been taken in equivalent trade?" Edward seriously pondered for a second then smiled as he sat up. "What am I talking about? Who cares! We've got our original bodies and nothing seems to be wrong with us, other than the fact that you need some clothing!" He said heavily smacking Alphonse on the back who sweat-dropped not sure whether to he happy that he could feel pain again or not. Alphonse was sitting on the ground without a stitch of clothing on. The hair on his head, that laid neatly around his shoulders, was the only thing covering any part of his body.

"Here." Edward said throwing his coat on the ground I'll transmute this into something you can wear for the time being. It won't be much but-" Edward stopped short in his words and fell to the ground.

"Brother! Alphonse said catching him.

"I don't know what's going on but I don't feel right, Al. I feel strange."

"Maybe you're just exhausted. I'll carry you out, after I transmute something to wear that is." Alphonse said smiling as he laid Edward on the ground. Standing up he turned to the coat and clapped his hands together changing it into a simple pair of pants and a white t-shirt. After getting dressed Alphonse gathered up Edward who had fallen asleep and draped him over his back to be carried out of the caverns piggyback style. With the homunculus, Sky, gone and his lackeys defeated and scattered they could sneak through the catacombs without encountering endangerment, at least that's what Alphonse hoped as he started to shakily walk out of the transmutation circle. Once on the bare ground he turned and to the face the circle.

_"I can't just leave this thing here…" _He thought and careful placed Edward on the ground. Clapping his hands together again he placed them on the ground and made the dirt that transmutation circle was drawn on shift and roll until the design was lost and the room went black. "Oh, good grief," Alphonse said as he searched in the dark for Edward then proceeded to carry him out to the surface.

In the middle of a bright meadow Alphonse had stopped to rest after braving the treacherous journey through the underground city up to the surface and then through a thick forest. He wasn't sure where he was but he could finally breathe clean air for the first time in a long time. Carefully laying Edward on the ground he sighed happily and clapped his hands together. The dirty that accumulated on his body and clothing while underground faded away. Clapping his hands together again he placed them on Edward's chest and did the same, but something wasn't right. Alphonse sweat-dropped as he tried to figure out why his brother seemed so soft up top. Carefully placing a hand back down on Edward's chest Alphonse sweat-dropped again and snatched it back.

"Oh, Edward," He moaned sounding as if he were going to cry.

"Uuuugh," Edward groaned waking up. "Hey, we're outside!" He said stretching and sitting up and looking over at his brother. "Eh? What's wrong with you, why the down attitude?"

"Edward…" Alphonse started then paused.

"Just spit it out already!" Edward boomed.

"Edward, look at yourself! Your body… What happened to your body?" Al screamed with tears in his eyes.

"What's wrong with my body?" Edward mumbled looking down at himself to see what in the world his brother could be screaming about, then he noticed it. "Huh?" Edward said placing his hands on his chest. "What the hell?" He exclaimed moving his hands further down then let out a blood curdling scream.

To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I don't know if I made it clear before but I will just flat out say it so there is no doubt. This a fan fiction which means I am not Hiromu Arakawa, Shounen Gangan (Square Enix), Viz nor any of the other copyright holders cuz if I were I'd be to busy cooking up a marketing plan to sell Fullmetal Alchemist fashion dolls (Ed would come with a change of clothing and a hair brush of course), but not to get side tracked in my disclaimer… in no way is this being used for my own personal gain except the joy of being a fan and all the nice people who gave me a good review on this story; thanks!

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Two: When Alchemy Goes Terribly TERRIBLY Wrong Part B

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! That BASTARD!" Edward screamed. "That #$! Bastard!" Edward exploded again and took off into the distance.

"Edward! Brother… Wait! Alphonse screamed taking off after him.

Human kind can not gain anything without sacrificing something equivalent in value. This is the root principle of Alchemy but the in an attempt to resurrect their dead mother the Elric brothers, Edward and Alphonse, ignored this law and committed the forbidden act of alchemy on a human being. The attempt to bring back their dead mother failed miserably and the rebound cost Edward his left leg and his younger brother, Alphonse, nearly lost his life. Only by sacrificing himself was Edward able to anchor his younger brother's spirit to a nearby suit of armor; this second human transmutation cost Edward his right arm. Despite the tragedy that befell them Edward will not rest until he restores his brother to flesh and blood and the two limbs that he lost. With the only possible way to access such information on how to do so is by becoming an alchemist certified by the state, Edward undergoes the excruciatingly painful of surgery of attaching mechanical limbs to his body called automail in order to freely move around and heads to Central to take the military exam to become a State Alchemist.

Knowing what they could loose by performing another human transmutation, upon receiving his certification Edward returns to his home town of Resembool to burn down the house he and his brother inherited when his mother died and the two brothers set off on their quest to return to their original bodies…

Edward lay on the ground in the middle of a massive transmutation circle, his body serverly bleeding. _"How did this happen?" _Edward thought as he lay helplessly at the feet of his opponent. _"I can't move. Damn it! I can't move!" _Edward thought as he struggled to move his body but he couldn't even bend his fingers let alone continue fighting against a homunculus whose power and abilities rivaled that of the all the Sins put together. _"What am I going to do? I can't just let him kill me, but it doesn't look like I have much of a choice."_ Edward thought as the man took his time walking over to the spot where he had flung Edward after stabbing him in the stomach multiple times.

"Heh, you're time is up, but don't worry you'll make an excellent sacrifice to the creation of the great stone." The homunculus said as he stared down at Edward with a huge grin. "Say good night." He said preparing to make the final strike that would kill Edward instantly.

Edward looked up at the man and then closed his eyes. _"I'm sorry, Al."_

"BROTHER!" Alphonse yelled rushing to Edward's rescue. With one blow he knocked the man a good distance away from Edward then continued the attack. "I wouldn't let you lay another hand on him!"

"Ha, hahahaha! You think you stand a chance against me? You're nothing but an empty shell." The homunculus taunted as he dodged Alphonse's attacks. "I was going to dispose of the tiny alchemist first but since you're so eager you'll be the first I sacrifice. Yes, you're soul should do nicely as well…" He said dodging another well executed attack from Alphonse and ramming the dagger he held into his back slicing threw the steel as if were skin.

"Ah!" Alphonse exclaimed quickly turning and laying what would have been a devastating strike to the homunculus' head. The blow hit with such force it knocked him clear out of the transmutation circle.

"Heh, hehehe" The man chuckled as he wiped a trickle of blood from his nose. "You made me bleed, interesting. This is turning out to be an exciting day!" He said standing up. "Now where was I? Oh! I remember disposing my two best sacrifices yet to the creation of the great stone."

"I won't let you do that." Alphonse said darkly. "It won't be enough for you to just get rid of us, the ones who've caused you so much trouble in what you're trying to do."

"Humph, about time you realized that. I need more human blood and spirit energy to amplify the power of the stone I'm creating. The more that die the less head aches for me and the more powerful I will become."

"You're wrong. Me and brother could see through your plan from the beginning, we just didn't know what to do about it… No, we were unwilling to do what it would take to stop you from harming anyone else."

"Oh, and what was that, huh?"

"Killing you." Alphonse said heavily.

"K-kill me? Kill me? Bwahahahaha! You couldn't kill me even if you tried! But one thing is for certain, I'm going to kill you and end your brother's suffering by finishing him off right afterward, that is if he doesn't bleed to death before I can get to him. Hah! Who knew the little squirt had so much blood in him?" He shrugged. "I commend you for surviving this long but that ends here." The man said charging at Alphonse.

"It will end here…" Alphonse said clapping his hands together and creating a burst of flames that stopped the homunculus in his tracks.

"What the-?" He said as he found himself surrounded by flames. _"What is he using for kindling? He can't just make flames out of nowhere from nothing. What could he be using to create a spark?" _He thought as the flames heat intensified. _"Either way it doesn't matter, once I off him."_ With that thought in mind the homunculus readied his blade and charged through the flames but found that no matter where he went he was met with an explosion of fire. "Do you really think this can stop me? I'll kill you! I'll kill you both! You're alchemy won't save either of you!" He yelled becoming frantic. The flames were starting to take a toll on his body and there was nothing he could do about it; no matter which direction he ran in he couldn't escape the onslaught of flames. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" The man screamed has his body started to burn away.

Alphonse stood watching the body of the homunculus was consumed by the fire and despite knowing that he was a cold blooded killer, truly an evil being beyond hope, Alphonse couldn't help but feel a slight pain as he burned him to death; the only way it seemed to kill beings like him. It only took a few minutes for the homunculus to become nothing but a pile of ash on the ground, but for Alphonse Elric those few minutes seemed to stretch on forever as he listened to the dying man's screams of pain and agony. He didn't want to see a body once the flames died down- that was the only reason it took a full three minutes to burn the homunculus to a crisp. Once the flames did die down there wasn't even an outline of the deceased homunculus on the ground, just a pile of blacked dirt and ashes.

When Edward came to he could hear his brother calling his name frantically. He wanted to reassure him that he was still with him for the time being, Edward knew his time was coming to an end. Opening his eyes he looked up at his brother. He couldn't just die and not at least try to return his brother back to his original body. _"Why is he arguing with me about this? It's not like he can stop me from dying and I can't die leaving him in that body. I won't!" _Edward thought using the last of his energy to clap his hands together and letting his left hand drop down onto the transmutation circle. Immediately everything went dark.

_"Am I dead?"_ Edward thought as his eyes searched the never ending darkness. _"Where am I?"_ He wondered as he felt himself drifting in the darkness. Suddenly light poured in from nowhere and he found himself standing in an empty pale gray room with gigantic golden double doors that seemed as if they would never open. _"I've been here before." _Edward thought as his eyes widened.

"So, you've come to visit me yet again." A voice said as a faceless body engulfed in white light appeared across the room in front of him. "You will never learn will you?"

"This isn't about learning a lesson. I did what I did to get my brother back to normal, in a human body; I want my brother's body back!" Edward screamed. "I don't care what you take from me just give him back his body! He shouldn't have to continue to pay for something I talked him into doing, so give it back to him! Give it back to him, damn you!" Edward continued screaming as he broke down in tears.

"You really don't know how to beg do you? First of all it would have helped if you weren't on death's welcome matt when you came here and second you're brother has a mind of his own and what he did he did of his own free will. No matter what words of persuasion are used, no matter what means of blackmail or even threats of torture or death can force a person to **_decide_** to do something they don't want to do. You fool!" The faceless figure said bending down to meet Edward face to face. "Is that what you're crying about? What you've been hurting about inside all this time? Your brother knows this and yet you carry around guilt for something that had nothing to do with you?"

"I don't care. I'm his older brother. I was supposed to look out for him but I failed him. I won't fail him again. Give my brother back his body!" The faceless being remained quiet for a moment as it stared into Edward's eyes.

"Hm, I see you'd sacrifice your life and even your soul if it meant your brother could walk and live as a whole human being. Very well then," The being said standing up. "But you know something of equal value must be taken in exchange. You remember what it cost last time, do you, just to so you could have his spirit?"

The being before him had no face that could be seen but Edward was sure it was giving him a menacing stare. _"You don't have to remind me it cost me an arm and…" _Edward's thoughts trailed off as he stood backing away from the being and bringing both his hand to the neither regions of his body. "I'm prepared for you take whatever you want but I just want to know one thing…"

"What?" The being asked curiously.

"You aren't going to take my underwear again, are you?"

"You were about to be a dead man so what's it matter to you if I take them this time or not?" The being asked with such fierceness in its voice it caught Edward off guard startling him. "Well, just so you know, along with something very precious and close to you I will be taking that too, both pair of them!" The being said and let out a menacing laugh as the golden double doors, gate of knowledge, opened and sucked Edward in.

_"Damn it! Ever since then I've worn two pair of underwear just in case something like this happened again and I somehow managed to survive. Why can't he be happy with the first pair he took?" _Edward thought as shadowy arms grabbed at every part of his body. _"And if he had to take another pair why couldn't he just take one? Why did he have to steal them both this time? What the hell is he going to do with them anyway? Whenever I've seen him he was always walking around naked. At least I think he was naked. I can't tell with him looking like a human light bulb, but still what kind of demented freak goes around taking underwear off a person's body in equivalent trade?" _Edward thought as he tried to ignore the pain of his body repeatedly being ripped and torn apart then put back together again. "Just what the hell is wrong with you!" Edward screamed into the void before everything went black again.

When he opened his eyes he was looking up at his brother again but this time at a face of flesh and blood and not steel; it was smiling at him. For the first time and a long time Edward felt at peace. His brother finally got his body back and from the looks of things he did as well. Still, for some reason Edward couldn't keep his eyes open. The last thing he remembered before falling unconscious again was the sight of his brother smiling at him.

To Be Continued


	3. Chapter 3

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Three: What Was Taken In Exchange

When Alphonse caught up to Edward he was clear across the field sitting on the ground with his arms folded across his chest, body shaking. "Brother?" Alphonse called uncertainly after somewhat catching his breath. He was going to take a step closer but something told him to just stay back. "Brother, are you okay?"

"Tell me Al, would you be okay in this condition?" Edward growled as he desperately tried to keep from crying. "My body isn't bogged down by that damn automail anymore but now, but now…" Edward's voice trailed off as he lowered his head. His face was twitching uncontrollably as he tried to force the tears that had welled up in his eyes to stay put.

All Alphonse could do was watch as the person he called brother seemed to have a mental break down. He couldn't take seeing Edward in such pain. Taking a step forward Alphonse froze in his tracks when Edward let out the most terrible scream he had ever heard pass through anyone's lips. The sound was so awful it immediately made him cry; a scream so loud and so horrible a dairy farmer just beyond the edge of the forest the Elrics were on the other side of could hear it and wondered if it wasn't some poor animal being tortured to death by a sadistic hunter. Falling face forward onto the ground Edward starting sobbing uncontrollably. It was a matter of seconds before Alphonse was right there beside Edward holding him and crying with him. They had sought so diligently for a way to return to the way they were and now that neither of them were trapped in a suit of armor or had to carry around heavy robotic limbs they still had not reached their ultimate goal and were both wondering if they ever would, if it was even possible.

After a while the two continued their journey to civilization through the forest and though it was not as thick as the first one they had traveled through it was still very wide. They had no idea how long it would take for them to walk through it and as the sun set they worried about wild animals attacking during the night. Yet again Alphonse ended up carrying Edward on his back as the trek had proved to be too much for him. Hurriedly trudging forward despite his sore feet and aching back Alphonse would not rest until they reached a town of some sort where he could possibly get Edward to a doctor. It was maybe around nine o'clock at night when Alphonse made his way into the farmland beyond the woods. Pushing Edward, who had started to slide, back up on his back he continued walking but his feet were bloody and blistered and it quickly became more and more difficult for him to move on.

"Don't worry Brother, I'll get help for you soon. Don't worry." Alphonse repeated as his legs gave away and he fainted.

In a house not too far away a little girl was staring up at the stars with her telescope. She loved looking up at the night sky but more than that she loved looking down at the fields, once all the grownups had gone home from work, and watching the fireflies dances in them. Their brilliant colors and constant motion made them much more entertaining than the still white lights that decorated the sky. Moving the scope on its mount to look down at the fields something on the ground caught her eye. Adjusting the lenses to see what exactly was lying out on the dirt road leading into town the little girl gasped. "Grandpa!" She yelled running out of her room.

Sometime later Alphonse awake with a start, abruptly sitting up in the bed he had been placed in and slightly startling the old man who was bandaging his feet. "Brother!" Alphonse called frantic.

"Brother?" The old man repeated. "Son, was there a third person with you?"

"Third person?" Alphonse murmured then shook his head. "No, sir it was just me and my sister." He answered heavily. "Where is she?" He asked looking around the dark room who's only light was a small candle sitting on a table.

"She's sleeping in a room with my grand-daughter."

"She needs to see a doctor." Alphonse said attempting to get out of bed but the old man stopped him.

"Hold on there son, you aren't in such great shape yourself and besides she's already seen the best medic in town." The old man said with a slight smile of pride.

"Who?" Alphonse asked.  
"You're looking at him" The old man winked. "Now, hold still so I can finish wrapping your feet." The old man said sternly and Alphonse reluctantly laid back down. "It's funny you know? I thought for sure the antiseptic I applied to the cuts on your feet would jolt you back to consciousness, you must be made of some strong stuff kid, to sleep through that as badly damaged as your feet are. Heh, it's a wonder you made here to be honest."

"I couldn't stop I had to get Edward some help." Alphonse said sleepily.

"Edward? Strange name for a girl." The old doctor commented. "By the way my name's Brawly and my grand-daughter is Susan, she's the one that spotted you."

"My name is Alphonse, thank you very much for you're help, sir." He said before falling asleep.

The next day when Alphonse tried to get out of bed tears came out of his eyes when he tried to stand up. _"Owwe, it hurts too much to even stand."_ Alphonse thought. Hearing the door to the room he was in creek open he turned around to see a brown haired little girl standing shyly behind it. "Good morning, Susan." Alphonse said with a smile.

"Ah!" The little girl gasped slightly. _"He knows my name..." _She thought dreamily. _"Wait, stop acting like an idiot of course he does. Grandpa probably told him. Now straighten up, he probably doesn't like girls who act all immature." _Susan thought gathering her courage, puffing up her chest and walking confidently into the room. "You're feet probably hurt a lot so when I woke up this morning I made these slippers for you to wear. They have a lot of padding and are really soft inside so they should be really comfortable for you to walk around the house in." She said handing him the house shoes.

"Thank you very much, for the slippers and for helping me and my sister." Alphonse said graciously accepting her gift.

_"Sister?__ Did I hear him right? That sleep talking annoying girl is his sister? Yes!" _Susan thought excitedly. "No problem." The girl said slightly blushing and left to prepare lunch.

"Hey…" Alphonse heard a familiar voice call from the door a few minutes after Susan had left.

"Brother." Alphonse said turning his head to see a still very sleepy Edward standing in the doorway.

"The old man said you hurt yourself pretty bad." Edward said sitting down on the bed behind his little brother and yawning. Then a sad look came across his face. "How are you feeling?" He asked.

Alphonse sighed feeling a little uneasy at the question. At that time his feet were in a lot of pain but he didn't want his "brother" to worry about him so he gave a slight smile before answering the question. "It hurts a little but I'm fine."

"Just a little," Edward questioned. "The doctor said your feet were cut up pretty bad and you say it only hurts a little?"

"Yeah, just a little." Alphonse lied sweat dropping.

"Uh-hm." Edward said eyeing his brother fully aware of the lie he was being told. "You know you could have just left me. I would have caught up sooner or later."

"Don't say that!" Alphonse said turning around with an angry expression on his face. Why did Edward always have to say stupid things like that and piss him off? "What if some wild animal decided to eat you? Besides I just couldn't leave you lying in the middle of nowhere without knowing that you were okay and Brother you were not okay."

"Ah, is that so?" Edward said with his back still to him as he started to feel like a total heel for saying something like that to his brother but he couldn't help it; when it came down to it Alphonse's well being was far more important than his own, but at the same time he knew if Alphonse had left him in the forest all alone he'd probably cry himself to death literally.

It only took a minute for Alphonse's anger to subside and now he was looking at his brother with concern. "Are you doing well yourself, Brother?" He asked carefully eyeing him.

"Yeah." Edward said putting his melancholy feelings aside as he stood up and stretched.

"Brother…" Alphonse said worriedly.

"I'm fine." Edward said with a more cheery attitude as he turned around and gave his brother the sincerest smile he could muster to back up the lie he just told. "Anyway, smells like lunch is done. Move your butt or I'll eat your portion." Edward said as he trotted out of the room and down the stairs.

"Brother!" Alphonse called as he rushed to get out of the bed wincing in pain. Even with Susan's special slippers it still hurt to stand but nowhere near as much as before and with hurried limping Alphonse made his way down the stairs and to the table before Edward could make good on his threat.

Later in the day Edward found himself being held captive by Susan. He sat nervously on the bed he had slept in the night before as she rummaged through a trunk on the floor in her closet. "Found it!" She said triumphantly and pulling out a small box. Carefully opening it she pulled out the folded garment inside. "I'm still too small to wear it." She said with tears hanging from her eyes.

"Don't worry you'll get big enough to fit it in no time." Edward said in a tone that said 'trust me' and apparently it worked because the little girl's face lit up, but then went sad again as her eyes rested on him.

"But you said you're 16 and you don't look big enough to fit it…" Susan said sniffling.

"Hey!" Edward shouted about to go on a rant but Susan had started crying waterfalls. "Ah, geez," he said getting up off the bed and walking over to her. "Ah, there, there," Edward said nervously as he gently patted her left shoulder.

"Uwaaaaaah!" Susan cried even harder as she reached out and hugged Edward. Afterward it only took a few minutes for her to calm down. "Get off me!" Susan said pushing Edward with enough force so that he hit the flood with a thud. "I'm not a little kid."

"Why you little-," Edward started popping up off the floor onto his feet. "Then what are you then?" He asked angrily.

"I'm a sophisticated woman." The little girl replied then turned her attention to carefully refolding the dress and placing it back into its box.

Edward sighed. "Yeah, whatever. What's with you and that dress anyway?"

"It was my mom's. It was her prettiest dress and when she died I visited her grave and promised her I'd wear it for her when I was big enough so that it didn't go to waste, but it's taking so long." Susan said hanging her head. "I want to be super attractive just like mommy when I grow up." Susan smiled as she turned to face Edward with a huge smile. "That's why I need to know something…" The girl asked her expression turned serious as her eyes settled heavily on Edward.

_"What coud she need to know from me?" _Edward thought.

"I was thinking since it would be a while before I got taller that at least I could work on my chest."

"Huh?" Edward sweat dropped.

"So, that's why I wanted you here. I want to know your secret." Susan whispered.

"M-my secret," Edward asked not liking where he thought the conversation was going.

"You're chest is really big and hear men think that's attractive so I want to know I can have one as big as yours." Susan continued to whisper.

"What?" Edward shouted falling over.

"Are you okay big sister Ed?" Susan asked the teenager crumpled on the floor.

"I have nothing to say." Edward responded gloomily as he got up to leave the room but Susan caught him around the waist in a vice grip.

"You're not leaving until you spill the beans!" She said becoming angry.

Irritated Edward yanked her arms from around his waist and sat her down on the bed. "Fine I'll tell you but have to promise you won't start crying again."

"Okay." Susan promised.

"Listen, some women just have big chests, but that doesn't make them more attractive."

"Huh?" Susan uttered not completely convinced.

"Listen to me Susan if a man is just attracted to you because your chest is bigger than your brain than he's a looser. You know why? Because he is more comfortable with your bra size being bigger than what's in your head, that means in actuality he's another moron scared of being shown up by a woman and people like that don't love anyone but themselves."

_"Wow, she's really smart and pretty." _Susan thought.

"Trust me Susan jerks like that won't do you any good." Edward finished then looked at her and sweat dropped. Susan's eyes had grown ten times their original size and were sparkling.

"Big sister Edward…"

"Y-yeah?" He answered nervously.

"I love you!" Susan said wrapping her arms around Edward in a tight hug.

Edward's heart nearly jumped out of his throat from surprise, before he patted her on the head hugging her back. _"Humph, and here I was thinking she was just another brat."_

"Big sister Ed, can I braid your hair later?" Susan asked cheerfully. Edward sweat dropped but agreed with a nod and a mumbled 'yeah'. "Really? Great! I'll be back soon she said hopping off the bed and running out of the room. Sighing Edward laid down and went to sleep.

It was only seconds later that Susan burst into the room Alphonse was in startling him just as he was about to take a nap himself. "Oh! Susan." He said surprised.

_"I have to know if he's as smart as his sister is." _Susan thought suddenly becoming nervous. "Um, uh, I, um, uh." Susan stuttered as she walked slowly over to him.

"It's okay you can ask me." Alphonse reassured with a smile.

"You know?" Susan exclaimed.

"Well you kind of looked like you wanted to ask me something." Alphonse sweat dropped.

"Well um…" Susan asked taking a step closer then tripped.

"There you go." Alphonse said catching her then sitting her down on the bed next to him.

_"Oh, he's so awesome."_ Susan thought blushing. "Um, do you think I should work hard at being smart or should I just concentrate on being pretty?" Susan asked looking down at her hands. "Not that I need to put that much effort into either…" She added.

"Being pretty is nice." Alphonse started causing Susan's heart to sink. "But, it's more important to be aware of the world around you and the things in it, I think." He smiled.

Susan's face formed into a large smile. "Thanks, Alphonse!" She said running out of the room and down to her grandfather's study. _"I'll show him how smart I am!" _She said opening up a grad school level medical book and started reading. _"But these words are too big for me to understand." _Susan thought as tears huge from her eyes once again. _"He probably can't stand being around dumb women. I won't give up!"_ She said to herself pulling a medical dictionary and a regular dictionary off the shelf before sitting down to study.

A/N: You'll notice (if you already haven't) that whenever Alphonse says 'brother' to Edward the 'b' is capitalized. That's due to the fact that he's constantly calling Edward 'oniisan' (big brother) and I wanted to denote that difference (particularly the honorific) without constantly typing out the words 'big brother' and to avoid using any Japanese words in this fiction, which I am finding kind of difficult to do by the way. I just get these urges to type certain things in Japanese…


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Hey all! I just wanted to make sure it was made clear that Edward is NOT a transvestite. He is completely female, with built in female hormones, and females everything from the inside out, just as if he were born that way. I just wanted to point that out since I refer to Edward as a 'he' in this story even though 'he' is clearly a full fledged 'she'. I hope this didn't cause any confusion for anyone. '

In the next chapters to come I think I will be bringing up some things the readers might have been wondering or answering questions, if anyone e-mails me with them, in my 'author's notes' at the end of the chapters. Hopefully that will clear some things up about this story and so on…

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Four

Once his stomach was full Edward was liable to lie down and never get up until the next morning, or next feeding. Currently he slept on top of the covers of his bed with the left edge of his shirt pulled up revealing his stomach, a habit that irritated Alphonse who was currently standing over him with a frown on his face. "Geez, Ed." He said pulling down his shirt and putting the covers over him.

"Now let's go someplace special, where they have roller coasters and lots of junk food. Let's celebrate…" Edward said talking in his sleep. Alphonse paused to listen to him as he did when trapped in the armor. Sometimes the things his brother said during the night made him want to cry and other times it was just ridiculous nonsense and mischievous ranting that made him want to reach over and punch Edward in the jaw. This time however was one of the times that the words that came from Edward's mouth made him want to cry.

"We finally got our bodies back." Edward said and even though he was asleep the reality of the waking world seeped in turning his dream into a nightmare and he begin to cry in his sleep. Attempting to calm his sleep sobbing brother Alphonse put his right hand over his forehead and in a matter of seconds Edward calmed down.

_"Don't worry Brother; I'll do whatever I can to get you back to normal again."_ Alphonse swore.

Just as Alphonse was about to leave Edward sat up slightly and grabbed his brother's arm hugging it. "Mother, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry." Edward repeated over and over again. Alphonse stood there with tears in his eyes not knowing what to do.

"I just wanted you to know that we still love you." Edward said letting go of his brother's arm and falling back onto the bed.

While in the armor there were many nights that Alphonse found himself hurting for his brother, but not like this. Before he couldn't shed tears and now that he could it just didn't seem like enough. It was a relief that he could finally express the pain he was feeling, but despite having cried plenty since returning to his original form it just seemed no matter how many tears he shed the sorrow would never end. Now he understood why Edward kept such a tight lock around his feelings, why we would not consciously allow himself to cry, because he knew if he started he might not ever stop. Tucking Edward back in Alphonse held himself together long enough to make it back to his own bed to silently shed his tears until the next morning.

Susan stood nervously at Alphonse's room door. When she woke up she had begged her grandfather to let her help with his work and even though he thought she was still too young he knew the passion his grand-daughter had for science, medicine in particular, so he gave her a simple task as a test and if she passed then he'd allow her to assist him. Giving her antiseptic, along with a few other things he told her to go change Alphonse's bandages. Susan took the supplies eagerly but now, standing outside the closed door she wanted to run away. Taking a deep breath Susan opened the door and walked in quietly. Alphonse was still asleep and she didn't want to wake him yet just incase she decided to run, because after all he could change the bandages himself, she could just quietly sit what he needed down on the table and leave but she knew her grandfather would be upset and disappointed in her so she crept over to the other side of the bed as quietly as she could so that she could see his face. Alphonse lay on his side with his back to the door and the only way to get a better view was to either wake him up or walk around to the other side.

_"Oh, what if the antiseptic stings too much or what if I mess up and do something to hurt him? If that happens he'll think I'm the worst doctor and person in existence." _Susan thought as she closed her eyes and tears feel like rivers down her face. Opening her eyes she had finally gathered the courage to wake him up, but found herself just staring at him instead. _"Wow, he's so handsome." _Susan thought leaning closer to his face.

"Good morning, Susan." Alphonse said fully awake but eyes still closed.

"AAAAAAAAAAGH!" Susan screamed and throwing everything up in the air as she jumped back. The items she was carrying in a small wooden box lay scattered on the floor. If her grandfather was home he would have been in the room in no time flat to see what all the commotion was about. As for Edward, he could sleep through an earthquake so of course he wasn't there.

Immediately Susan started gathering up everything she had dropped. "I'm sorry." Alphonse apologized. "I didn't me to frighten you. Let me help-"

"No!" Susan answered sharply cutting him off. "And you didn't frighten me I was just really surprised because I thought you were still asleep." She said keeping her head lowered so that he could not see her burnt red blushing face.

Alphonse sat on the bed nervously. Susan seemed rather angry and for some reason in that instance she reminded him of Lt. Hawkeye.

"Hmph!" Susan huffed sitting the box down on the bed. "What kind of doctor would I be if I let my patient do all the work?" She asked facing him.

"Oh I see! You're helping your grandfather today." Alphonse said cheerily.

"That's right! I sure am." Susan smiled happily.

"He said my job was to take care of your bandages and to see if the wounds were healing well." Susan said as she pulled his left leg onto her apron covered lap and started to carefully remove the bandages. "Anyway, why didn't you let me know you were awake so I could get to work?" Susan asked feeling a bit put off and embarrassed by the sudden start.

"Sorry about that." Alphonse sweat dropped. "I just woke up a minute ago when I smelled your perfume."

"Oh, really," Susan asked her face turned red again and she started removing the bandages even faster.

"Hm, hmm, it smells really nice." Alphonse added."

"It was my mom's." Susan said keeping her eyes focused on her work. When she saw how damaged his feet were she wanted to cry but doctors aren't supposed to cry so she choked it down and continued her work.

"All done." She declared once she had finish wrapping his feet in clean bandages.

"Thank you very much doctor." Alphonse said giving her a bow in his seat.

"No problem." Susan said has she left the room. Once she was outside her eyes started to swirl. _"Blood, so much blood."_She thought.

"Hey squirt." Edward said as he made his way to Alphonse's room. "Are you ok?" He asked noticing Susan's dizzy movements.

"I'm just fine!" She said straightening up.

"Okay." Edward said walking past her when she grabbed the back of his black jacket. "Eh? What is it?"

"Um, could you help me make breakfast?" Susan asked sweetly.

"I don't know how much help I'll be, you'd be better off with Alphonse helping-"

"No, I want you to do it, just us women." Susan insisted.

"Fine," Edward groaned not because he didn't want to help, but because the words 'us women' were used in reference to himself and a little girl.

After cleaning up and preparing breakfast with Edward's help Susan insisted that she bring the food to Alphonse, saying that he shouldn't walk around with his feet as damaged as they were. Heaping enough food on a tray for three people Susan went up stairs. Seeing that the door to his room was already cracked open she was going to go on in until she saw him take off his shirt. Susan took a step back feeling like her brain was going to explode. _"Huh?" _She thought feeling something wet and warm slide down her mouth, she looked down to see a trail of blood dripping into the oatmeal she had prepared for him and ran off.

Edward was still in the kitchen when Susan cam crashing in. Quickly she sat the tray down, grabbed a piece of paper towel to stuff in her left nostril, and then dumped the oatmeal into the trash. After washing her hands she ran over to where Edward was sitting, as he greedily ate his food, and attempted to snatch his portion of oatmeal away. Just as seemed she was going to just take the food and run Edward grabbed up the bowl before her fingers could even touch it. "What are you doing?" He asked eyes narrowed.

"Please, just give it to me." Susan pleaded her eyes watering up. Edward couldn't stand seeing the little girl cry and handed it over with a heavy sigh.

"Take it." Edward said pushing the bowl over to her then continued eating what was left of the food before him. Susan took the bowl and the tray and happily ran off.

Once again approaching the door Susan's arms begin to shake. What if she has another nose bleed? Gulping and closing her eyes she carefully pushed the door open. "I brought you something to eat." She said coming into the room. Opening one eye she could see that Alphonse was fully dressed and gave a small sigh of relief.

"Thank you very much." Alphonse said taking the tray for the little girl. "Have you eaten yet, Susan?"

"Actually no I haven't." Susan answered after quickly turning around to take the piece of paper towel out of her nose and stuffed it in her pocket.

"Would you mind eating with me?" Alphonse asked with a hopeful smile.

"I, um…" Susan said nervously taking a step back and wondering if you had taken the paper towel out too soon.

"This sure is a whole lot of food. I don't think I can finish it all by myself and I'd love it if you'd stay and keep me company." Alphonse said his gaze settling gently on her.

In Susan vision his hopeful gaze was blown way out of proportion as he seemed to shine in her eyes. "Okay." Susan answered happily taking a seat next to him on the bed. Alphonse smiled at her and she felt her face grow beat red. Putting her hands to her face as if she were washing it Susan let out a frustrated groan. "Hurry up and eat it before it gets cold." Susan said haughtily.

"Yes, ma'am." Alphonse responded picking up the fork. "Hmm, what should I eat first?" He asked. Susan's face turned even redder. Alphonse sweat dropped as he looked at her. "Is there something the matter?" He asked the frowning little girl.

"No!" She answered turning away. "I mean, no." Susan said a considerably calmer tone. "I, um just think you should try the oatmeal first. I made it from scratch." She said her cheeks a soft rose color as she spoke.

"Okay then." Alphonse said putting down the fork and picking up the spoon. "Mmm, good." He said after eating a spoon full.

"Really," Susan asked her eyes shining.

"Hm, hmm," Alphonse nodded. "You should have some too."

"Okay." Susan said pulling a spoon out of her other pocket and started eating with him. She was in heaven.

To Be Continued…


	5. Chapter 5

When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chatper Five

Alphonse sat quietly in a chair looking out the only window there was in the tiny bedroom; it faced the front of the house which gave anyone looking out of it a great view of the land. At that moment he was feeling extremely useless as he watched Edward toiling in the fields with everyone else. The siblings didn't have any money on them at the time and the only way to repay the doctor for his kindness and serves was to work on the farm land that whole town seemed to share, that's what they had decided to do since they didn't want to cause a stir by using alchemy which would have been easier considering the fact Edward didn't care too much at all for any kind work that involved heavy lifting. Despite being worn out Edward continued working as hard as he could; tilling ground, and helping with the harvest. Even from where he was Alphonse could see that his brother was struggling to keep up with everyone else and this made him worry. Ever since Alphonse received his flesh and blood body back along with his brother being turned into a girl Edward had also become prone to passing out and dizzy spells, but still he would not tell Alphonse what was wrong with him.

Pulling a rather large wagon full of corn Edward stumbled and fell face first onto the ground and the wagon tilted dumping nearly all of its contents on top of him. "Uugh," Edward groaned. "I have half a mind to just stay buried under here." He said out loud feeling a bit of relief to be lying down despite the pile of produce coving his body. Sighing he unearthed himself from beneath the corn and sweat dropped when he saw an angry Mr. Brawly looking down at him. "Hey pops." Edward said pretending he didn't see the look on the old man's face.

"What are you doing out? Didn't I tell you to stay out of the fields? Since when do people in your condition run around working like an ox? Neither you nor your brother will recover if you keep this up. If I catch you out here again I'm gonna make you start paying your stay and care." Brawly said as he piled the corn back into the wagon. The small farming town was by no means what anyone would call rich, except where generosity was concerned.

"Listen pops, I don't mean any disrespect, but me and my brother can pull our weight. We don't need anyone giving us charity."

"Stupid child, would it kill you to accept the kindness of others," Brawly asked pausing in his work. "Now, get back in the house."

"Okay, okay." Edward said turning on his heels. "Thanks." He said solemnly as he looked over his shoulder.

"The only thanks I want is for you and your brother to get better. Besides don't you think you should keep him company? I'm sure that brother of yours is bored to tears just sitting around in that room." Brawly said in a much gentler tone.

"Yeah." Edward said nodding then continued walking up the dirt road until he came to the doctor's home.

Alphonse watched as his brother came from the fields to the house. He could even hear Edward's foot steps as they landed heavily on the front porch and up the stairs. A few moments later Edward was walking into Alphonse's room. Coming to a stop in front of the table across from the foot of the bed he leaned back on it letting out a frustrated sigh.

"Ugh, it's hot in here." Edward said pulling down the zipper on his shirt. "Hey, don't tell me you've just been sitting there all day?"

"The Doctor said I should stay off of my feet for a while. Plus Susan wouldn't talk to me except to yell at me and order me back in here whenever I tried to help her with the choirs. That's left me nothing to do but watch everything from here."

Edward sighed. "Well, it looks like you're not the only one under house arrest now." Edward said as he sat on top of the table. "The old man just yelled at me for trying to help him out in the fields and then ordered me back here." Edward said hopping off the table. The room seemed to spin and for a second he lost his balance and had to grab hold of the metal rail at the foot of the bed to keep from falling.

"Ed, are you okay?" Alphonse asked.

"Yeah, just got a little dizzy," Edward answered trying to sound convincing and stood up straight.

Hearing the door creak they both turned to see who it was. "Oh, hi Sus-." Alphonse begin, but the little girl dashed off. Alphonse sighed. "Brother do you think Susan's afraid of me for some reason?" He asked feeling a bit shunned by the girl's reaction.

"Huh? You can't be serious." Edward said looking at his brother in disbelief.

"Well she seems to clam up around me but with you she seems more open. Earlier she seemed to open up to me a little when we were having breakfast, but down stairs during lunch she wouldn't talk to me and then just now she ran away."

"Awe, come on, Al. You're taking it the wrong way; she's probably just shy around strangers. The only reason she doesn't clam up around me is because we share a room together so she just probably got used to me being around faster." Edward smiled showing his teeth. He honestly did find Alphonse's self-consciousness a bit amusing. "Well I'm going to go clean up. See ya later bro." Edward said leaving the room.

"Why won't you tell him what's wrong, sis?" Susan asked Edward when came into the room they shared.

"Aaaagh! Don't call me that!" Edward shouted.

"Is that why Alphonse calls you brother, because you wouldn't like it if he called you sister?" Susan asked innocently.

"That's right!" Edward responded still in a nasty mood because Susan called him 'sis'.

"Sorry, geez. You don't have to yell at me." Susan said obviously hurt. "I just want us to be friends." She said tearing up.

"Hey, quit that. Stop it right now!" Edward ordered, but Susan only cried more. "Greif you're a crybaby." Edward said feeling drained just listening to the girl's wailing. "It's because I really like you and you hate me!" Susan said as she continued bawling, the tears gushing from her eyes.

"I don't hate you so calm down already." Edward said feeling a bit nervous, he really hated it when girls cried. "Listen I didn't mean it. You can call me big sis if you want."

"Really?" Susan said sniffling.

"Yeah, consider it a special privilege of being my friend, but don't do it in front of other people." Edward added.

"Can we be best friends?" Susan asked calmed down."

"Yeah." Edward said giving her a slight smile.

"And do things for each other we would never do for anyone else?" Susan asked cheering up even more.

"What are friends for?" Edward asked beads of sweat forming on his head. "What kind of things?" He asked nervously not really loud enough for Susan to hear.

"Yay!" Susan cheered. "As a special privilege I'll let you wear one of my mom's dresses. Susan said going through the clothes hanging in her closet. Most of the dresses were too big for Edward to wear, but finally Susan found something that looked like it wouldn't be too long on him. "This one!" Susan said triumphantly pulling a dress out of the closet; it was a simple short sleeved, navy blue dress with white polka-dots and a white collar.

"I can't wear you're mom's clothes." Edward said sweat dropping. "These clothes your grandfather let me and Al barrow are just fine. Edward said holding up an old pair of pants with a matching vest and white button down shirt.

"You can't wear that, they're boy's clothes!" Susan said frowning as she snatched them away with one hand and held the dress in front of Ed with another.

Edward sweat dropped. "You really want me to wear this?" He asked hoping the girl was having second thoughts about letting some body she hardly knew wear the treasure which were her mother's old dresses.

"Yes, best friends don't let each other go around wearing men's clothes." Susan said adamantly.

"Thanks." Edwards muttered taking the dress and leaving the room. At that moment he truly felt like crying but just swallowed it and went to get cleaned up.

Susan leaned against the wall and sighed. _"Phase one of operation 'Make Alphonse My Husband' is complete, me and his sister are best friends. Now, I just need to show him what a great choice I am which means spending more time with him, but I can't get my knees to stop shaking." _Susan thought suddenly becoming nervous. Hearing a knock on her room door she screamed. The sound wasn't that loud at all but it was enough to startle the daylights out of her as lost in her thoughts as she was.

"It's just me." Alphonse said opening the door hoping that would calm her down. Susan stood in front of him with a terrified expression on her face. "Susan, are you okay?" Alphonse asked sweat dropping.

_"Answer him stupid. Say, you're okay." _Susan thought as her heart beat raced.

_"She is scared of me…" _Alphonse thought. _"I guess even without the armor there's something about me that makes people uneasy."_ He thought looking at Susan who seemed to be frozen in fear. "I'm sorry, I scared you again, didn't I?" Alphonse apologized. He had come to see if she was okay since he heard her crying after Edward's yelling fit, but at that moment he was thinking perhaps all he was doing was upsetting her more. "I'll be leaving now." Alphonse said feeling awkward then went back to his room and closed the door. _"Brother was just trying to make me feel better, but the truth is I just seem to put people off for some reason." _Alphonse thought as tears fell like rapidly flowing rivers from his eyes.

Susan sweat dropped. _"I scared him away!" _She thought then fell back on her bed and pressed her face into her pillow so no one could hear her scream. _"How am I going to fix this? He probably thinks something is wrong with me! No, no he can't think that, that would utterly ruin things. I have to fix this, but how?" _Susan thought as she lay with her face pressed against the pillow. She wanted to scream again.

Downstairs Edward was undressing with his eyes closed. _"Don't look at anything and don't touch anything unless you have too." _Edward's face turned red. _"But I have to touch everything!" _He thought then started cursing.

After taking a shower in record time Edward was clean and wearing the dress Susan hand lent him. To say he felt uncomfortable would be an understatement. Susan's mother was a tall woman and the dress Edward was wearing would have came half way down her thighs but on Edward it hung just above mid-calf making him feel even more stunted than he already was. Other than that the dress fit Edward quite well. Unlike his black zippered shirt he was wearing before it didn't squeeze his chest uncomfortably making it easier to breath and the cloth didn't irritate his skin. It was mostly because the dress fit him so well was the reason behind Edward's awkward emotions concerning the garment. Knocking on the door before entering his brother's room he found Alphonse sitting on the floor, with his back to the wall, sulking.

"Why are you so upset?" Edward asked stepping into the room.

"Do I seem like a scary person?" Alphonse asked looking up at him.

Edward smiled nearly laughing in his brother's face. "Not hardly, why," He asked sitting down beside him.

"That dress looks good on you." Alphonse said getting a better look at the outfit.

Edward's expression turned sour. "Shut up." He said punching Alphonse and knocking him out. Looking down at his handiwork Edward sweat dropped. _"Yeah, he's not a suit of armor anymore so I can't be so careless, but then again if he were still armor I wouldn't have punched him in the face 'cause that would have probably knocked his head off." _Edward paused in his thoughts then laughed slightly. _"Oh well." _He said pulling Alphonse up off of the floor and laying him in the bed.

Twenty minutes later Alphonse opened his eyes to see his brother leaning over him. Edward was sitting with his legs folding under his body on the bed next to him. He was holding a cold compress to Alphonse's face to keep the swelling down. It helped a bit; however, there was still a nice bruise on the left side of his face. Alphonse sat up and grabbing his head as a headache quickly set in. "You didn't have to hit me, Brother." Alphonse grumbled. Being able to feel pain again Edward's punches and kicks hurt something fierce and at that moment Alphonse was making a mental note to pay him pay in full the next time they spar, despite the fact he never held back on tossing Edward around like a rag doll in the first place. When sparring with his brother Alphonse behaves just like cat does with its prey; he'd toy with Edward for a while before sending him flying in which ever direction of choice.

"Sorry about that." Edward said sweat dropping. "I guess I was a little careless."

"A little?" Alphonse questioned giving his brother a dangerous stare.

"Okay, I was a lot careless and you lost consciousness, but you aren't missing any teeth or anything right?" Edward asked but Alphonse's only response was stark silence as he brought his hands to rest in his lap keeping his head lowered.

"Right?" Edward said again leaning on his brother's shoulder trying to get a better look at his face to see if it lopsided due to missing teeth on one side.

Finding himself giving in to temptation, without warning, Alphonse lifted the arm his brother was leaning on and punched him in the side with enough force to send him flying off the bed onto the floor. "Quit getting so carrying away. I'm not armor anymore and the punch you gave me really hurt." Alphonse whimpered bringing his hands back up to his aching head.

_"Tell me about it." _Edward thought holding his side as he lay on the floor. "Hey, Al." He said with a smirk on his face.

"Yeah?"

"When did you become such a wimp?" Edward asked sitting up.

"Who are you calling a wimp?" Alphonse asked looking over at Edward.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't you just whining about how much that little tap I gave you hurt?"

"Tap? You knocked me out!" Alphonse shot back.

"Well then I guess that makes it twice I beat you." Edward grinned as he stood up.

"How do you figure? That wasn't a fight and that so-called win was because you cheated." Alphonse reminded.

"Fine, this time it wasn't a win, but you know in a real fight anything goes, so there's nothing 'so-called' about that win. I beat you."

"If I had actually fought you back you probably would have reopened the gash in your side again, so that wasn't a win for the simple fact it wasn't a real fight." Alphonse argued back.

"Hmph!" Edward said walking around the bed to the door, then turned around with a sneaky grin on his face. "Okay, fine we settle this outside right now, you and me."

Alphonse scowled at him. "You know I can barely walk, Brother, you cheater."

"Heh, then I win by forfeit and that ends this argument." Edward grinned.

"I'll make you eat those words soon enough, Brother."

"Now get your rest so you can heal up as soon as possible." Edward said closing the door as he exited the room.

_"Rest?__ I've had enough rest. If my feet didn't hurt so much we'd be outside and you'd be getting your backside pounded." _Alphonse thought as he looked down at the bandages that covered his feet and ankles. They needed to be changed. In some places blood had started to soak through. Standing up Alphonse was going to get the bandages and whatever else he need to do the job himself but when he opened the door Susan was standing there holding the small box that continued the fresh bandages and everything else needed to clean the wounds before they were applied.

Susan felt jittery. Why was it that before she could handle being in the same room with him, but today whenever the opportunity presented itself to get closer to him she either ran or stayed away?

"Hi, Susan." Alphonse greeted her cheerfully as usual.

"H-hello." Susan said nervously._ "Okay now this is your chance to fix things, don't mess it up by running or just standing here like an idiot."_ Susan thought then took a deep breath. "It's time to change the bandages on your feet." She said with more confidence.

"Okay, I can handle it." Alphonse said reaching for the box, but Susan snatched it away. "I'm the doctor here, I'll do it." She said with her usual spunk.

"I'm so lucky to have such a dedicated physician." Alphonse smiled.

Susan smiled back her cheeks a slightly rose colored, but the smile disappeared when she saw the bruise on his face. "Ah! Did you fall out of bed and hit your face?" She asked with concern.

Alphonse sweat dropped. Was the bruise on his face that noticeable? "Oh, it's nothing." Alphonse said laughing uncomfortably as he put his hand up to his swollen cheek.

"Okay." Susan said not really believing him but letting the matter slide anyway.

It didn't take long for Susan to finish changing his bandages this time around. She had been practicing on her dolls and had managed to cut her time in half. "All done she said with a smile."

"Thank you very much." Alphonse said feeling little better now that he wasn't wearing blood soaked bandages.

"You know if you don't stay off your feet they won't heal." Susan said looking down in the box at the bloody bandages.

"You're right." Alphonse said his thoughts leaning toward Edward. _"Brother must be getting impatient." _Alphonse thought looking down at his feet. _"It will probably be a while before my feet heal enough to walk on."_ Alphonse paused in his thoughts when he noticed Susan hesitantly standing with her back to him in the door. "Is there something wrong?" He asked noticing the girl's worried demeanor.

_"I wanted to say something to cover up my reaction to him earlier but it seems he's already forgotten. I'd probably only be bringing up unnecessary things and embarrassing myself all over again if I say anything dumb to try and justify it."_ Susan reasoned before answering. "No, it's nothing. I just thought I forgot something, that's all." Susan said keeping her back turned the quickly went to dispose of the bloody bandages.

To be continued…

Author's Note:

**You Damn Pervert!**

****

Hm, that's what I think some people might have said out loud or thought once they read the first chapter of this fiction and/or realized what was going on. Oh, yeah! Someone did say something about this being a "pervy" storyline. Yes, I am laughing at this because while this story is a bit strange and puts Ed in a rather awkward position (and that's putting it lightly) I have my reasons for putting Ed in the pickle he's in, most of which I think should have been very obvious from chapter one if not the entirety of it. :D

If anyone has read any of my other stories you pretty much know what to expect from me, but as for the rest of yous I'm having too much fun making your hearts jump so I'm not sayin' nothing as to the "why would you write such a thing?" question.


	6. Chapter 6

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Six

It was a few weeks before Alphonse's wounds had scabbed over and he was allowed to move about more freely. For the past few days Alphonse had busied himself helping Susan with her chores. Besides wanting to be helpful Alphonse was feeling rather antsy. He had had his body back for nearly a month and hadn't really been able to use it. Cleaning up the table after lunch he thought he heard movement on top of the house. Putting the last of the dishes away he went outside to see if something was indeed crawling around on the roof.

Susan was outside jumping rope since Alphonse had done nearly all of her chores for her. When jumping rope no longer appealed to her interest she found herself aimlessly wondering across the fields to the forest's edge. Realizing where she was she sweat dropped as she remembered her grandfather's warning about not going into forest without a grown up. Hearing something rustling in the trees Susan took off back toward her home. While she wasn't afraid of the forest she was most definitely afraid of the things in it, her greatest fear was being mauled to death by a badger or some other animal within the forest's depths.

It didn't take her long to make her way across the fields and back home. Standing hunched over, hands on knees Susan panted heavily trying to catch he breath. Hearing a soft purring Susan stood up straight still heavily breathing to see where the sound could have come from. Hearing it again she looked up to see a cat sitting on the roof. _"Oh, no it must be stuck."_ Susan thought walking over to a support beam and scaling up it onto the roof. Carefully she crawled over to where the cat was and it moved away from her, just out of arms' reach.

"Don't be afraid. Come here." Susan called sweetly to the creature and for amount it seemed as if it understood and believed what she was saying for it did not budge another inch. Continuing to move carefully toward the animal Susan reached out for the cat only for it run from her again. This time it ran and jumped straight off of the roof land perfectly onto the ground.

Alphonse was just inside the front door when he saw a cat come flying off of the roof onto the ground then run off into the distance.

"Stupid cat," Susan grumbled moving to come down off of the roof herself, but her foot slipped causing her to loose balance and down she came. Keeping her eyes clenched shut Susan had expected to hit the ground but when she felt a pair of arms encase her body instead of colliding with the ground she opened them puzzled.

"Are you alright, Susan?" Alphonse asked. He had caught her but ended up falling backwards onto the ground; the roof was higher than it looked and Susan had come down rather hard on Alphonse causing him to end up on his backside when he caught her. At first Susan had assumed it was her grandfather who had caught her but when she opened her eyes and heard the voice of the one responsible for saving her from a nasty fall her body stiffened.

"What's going on," Edward yelled as he came running out of the fields to his brother's side. He was hauling a wagon full of cabbage this time and was only a short distance from the house when he looked up and saw Susan falling from the top of the doctor's home, Alphonse successfully catching her, but still toppling over. "Hey, you alright," Edward asked Susan who was just staring off into space. Had she fainted with her eyes open? "I think she passed out." Edward said after waving a hand in front of the girl's face.

"Susan?" Alphonse called giving her body a gentle shake. "Are you okay?" He asked a little more concerned.

Blinking Susan came out of her trance. "I'm fine." She answered meekly.

"Thank goodness." Alphonse said sighing bringing his head down so that they were cheek to cheek as he gently hugged her.

Susan inhaled deeply, her heart racing. Hearing a popping sound in her head she broke free of the embrace running a few feet away from Edward and Alphonse and quickly bringing her left hand to her nose as the red, warm fluid flowed from it. "I'm fine, thank you." Susan said then ran into the house.

Edward let out a heavy sigh. "Boy that girl is weird." He mumbled.

"You think she is weird?" Alphonse questioned letting his eyes settle heavily on his brother. In all their travels the two had encountered many strange things and as far as Alphonse was concerned Edward was among them.

"Hm, now where did I leave that cart?" Edward said standing up and looking around. "Let me do it, Brother." Alphonse said standing and dusting himself off. While the doctor was particular about Edward working in the fields he had nothing to say to Alphonse once the cuts in his feet had healed well enough to walk on without bleeding so much.

"Go find something else to do." Edward said taking off into the fields.

"Brother, wait." Alphonse protested chasing after him. The rest of the day Alphonse followed Edward around as they both helped with the farming. Every so often Alphonse would have to push Edward down so that the doctor didn't see him. It was obvious why the doctor was so against Edward working in the fields he was already on the small side and if he happened to pass out it would be difficult to locate him plus the added danger if someone was out there plowing, they might not see him laying on the ground. What would happen to Edward if such an event did occur Alphonse didn't even want to think about it.

Sitting on the front porch watch the sun set Edward was leaning back on the palms of his hands with head tilted upward. "Grief, I'm tired and hungry." He complained. Alphonse was exhausted too; he sat a few feet away with his back against a support beam, his head resting on his right knee.

"Brother…" Alphonse said.

"Yeah." Edward responded. Then silence fell again. There was no need for words. They new exactly what the other was thinking; it was time to move on.

Later that night Susan could hear the siblings talking to her grandfather. She had originally come out of her room that night to get a drink of water but instead found herself listening intently at the top of the stairs as the Elrics thanked Brawly for his help and informed him that they were leaving the next morning. Hearing this news caused tears to form in her eyes. When Edward finally came back to the room Susan was lying in her bed awake. "Big sis.," Susan called startling him. Edward had come into the room as quietly as he could, believing Susan to still be sleeping.

"Yeah?" Edward answered sitting down on the bed across from Susan's and pulling off his pants.

"Are you and Al leaving soon?" She asked concealing the sob in her voice.

"Yeah, we've given you and pops enough grief." Edward said lying down.

"You haven't caused us any grief." Susan said getting out of her bed and crawling into bed with Edward.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Edward asked becoming slightly panicked.

"Can I sleep with you?" Susan asked pulling her most adorable face, which might have had some sort of effect if the lights weren't out and Edward could see her.

"No." Edward answered flatly.

"Please, this is the last time I'm going to see you." Susan pleaded giving Edward a one armed hug.

"Fine." Edward huffed pulling the covers over the both of them. _"Little brat." _Edward thought as he stroked the top of her head once before falling asleep.

When Edward awoke the next morning he found himself in the bed alone. He had slept rather uncomfortably and had a bit of cramp in his neck. Squinting his eyes Edward rubbed his neck for a couple of minutes until the knot was gone. Making a sound somewhere between a sigh and a groan Edward put his cloths on and came out of the room. Drowsily he wondered into Alphonse's room. Susan was already there contently brushing his hair.

"Hey, Brother." Alphonse greeted.

"Hi, Ed." Susan's voice followed as she fastened Alphonse's hair into a dark blue hair tie.

"Oh, so this is where you ran off to." Edward said lowly as he leaned back on the table. He watched them through drooping eyes. Usually once awake Edward was rearing to go, but that morning he could barely keep his eyes open.

"Brother, are you ok?" Alphonse asked as Susan continued playing with his pony tail.

"Hmm, I'm going back to bed." Edward said not hearing a word Alphonse had spoken to him.

"Alphonse and Susan sweat dropped as Edward bumped into the half open door. Usually a bumble like that would have been followed by an eruption of yelling and profanity, but this time Edward just pushed the door further open and continued on walking ignoring the lump that was forming on his forehead.

"Don't worry," Susan said hopping off of the bed and standing in front of Alphonse. Once she eats something she'll be just fine. You aren't going to be leaving before you eat something right?" Susan asked a hopeful glitter in her eyes.

"No, Bro- I mean Edward still seems a little too out it of it to do any traveling just yet." Alphonse honestly answered.

"I'll make breakfast for everyone this morning." Susan said brightly.

"I'll help you then." Alphonse said standing.

"No, I can do it alone. I want to do it alone." Susan said correcting herself. "I promise it won't take long." She said heading off to the kitchen.

As soon as Susan started cooking it only took for the scent to reach Edward's nose to bring him back to consciousness. Sleepily coming down the stairs Edward looked around and only saw Alphonse sitting at the table. "Where's the old man?" Edward asked sitting across from him.

"He went out of town earlier on a few house calls. Susan says he won't be back until this afternoon." Alphonse informed.

"Oh," Edward said acknowledging his brother's words.

"It's done!" Susan called from the kitchen.

"About time!" Edward said perking up and going into kitchen.

"Hey, you just can't eat it from the pan!" Susan yelled.

"Like hell I can't!" Edward responded a moth full of food. Alphonse sweat dropped as he pulled Edward from the kitchen, though not before his older brother was able to get hold of a spoon a pot full of grits.

_"Guess it's too much to ask for him to behave any longer." _Alphonse thought as he and Susan watched him greedily devour whatever wasn't already on someone else's plate and even after that was gone his golden eyes settled hungrily on the contents of Alphonse's and Susan's plates.

"Now way, Brother," Alphonse said snatching the plate from the table protectively.

"You've had enough. You're going to get fat you know?" Susan said snatching hers away as well.

"Awe, hell, but I'm still hungry." Edward complained as he left the table then let out a monster burp. Alphonse's eyebrows narrowed.

_"He better not." _Alphonse thought as he watched Edward wonder into the living room, pull the edge of his shirt from inside his pants and collapse onto the sofa asleep with his stomach exposed. "I can't believe he just did that." Alphonse uttered exasperatedly.

"Which part?" Susan asked as equally disturbed by Edward's actions.

"All of it."

Susan nodded in agreement. "So, I guess that means you'll be staying a little while longer." Susan smiled.

"Hm, hmm." Alphonse nodded then went over to where Edward was laying and pulled his shirt down. _"At least until Brother stops acting so scatter brained."_

It was nearly noon when Edward finally woke up again. Rubbing his eyes he sat up. "Alphonse?" He said noticing someone was sitting next to him.

"Yes." His brother answered calmly even though he felt like yelling at him. "You know Susan almost slipped you heavy dose of laxatives while you were busy devouring everything insight." Alphonse informed.

"What?" Edward exclaimed fully awake as he popped up into an upright position on the sofa.

"She honestly thought you had a tape worm or something." Alphonse continued in the same polite manner in which he always spoke. "I almost let her do it."

"You what?" Edward exploded again. "Some brother you are." He pouted folding his arms and slumping back onto the couch.

"I almost thought you were some how Gluttony." Alphonse continued.

"Don't joke like that." Edward shuddered, memories of having been swallowed once by the homunculus still fresh in his mind.

"Still, despite eating everything else in sight you didn't even touch the pitcher of milk sitting right in the middle of the table." Alphonse said receiving a dirty look from Edward in return. "What's gotten into you Ed," He finally asked.

"I don't know." Edward answered. "Maybe I do have a tape worm." He said with a solemn tone.

"Should I call Susan?" Alphonse asked.

"NO!" Edward exploded. "It was a joke, get it? A joke." He said angrily then stood up and stretched. "We've dawdled around here long enough time to go." He said putting his hands on his hips and stretching backward a bit. The chain attached to the gold watch in his front pocket jingled slightly and Alphonse's eyes fell heavily on it. If Edward knew what his brother was thinking at that moment he was sure to have thrown a fit.

A few minutes later everyone, minus the doctor, stood on the front porch of the old wooden house bidding their farewells. Susan was on the verge of tears.

"Bye, squirt." Edward said giving the girl a sincere hug.

"Squirt? You're barely taller than I am!" Susan said choking back the tears just long enough to let the sarcastic comment pass through her lips.

Edward turned red with fury. Letting Susan go he stomped off the porch and a little ways down the dirt path that lead to the house to fume somewhat in private.

"Good bye, Susan." Alphonse said kneeling down and hugging her.

"Good bye, Alphonse." Susan replied hugging him back then quickly pulled away turning her back to him, her face a slight red. Hearing Alphonse's foot steps leave the porch she turned back around a determined look in her eyes. "Alphonse, wait!" She called desperately.

"What is it, Susan?" Alphonse asked turning around not even a step away from the house when she called to him. Susan!" He exclaimed wide eyed when the girl came flying off of the porch. He moved quickly enough to catch her, but he was actually the one who was caught.

"Al." Edward growled impatiently. "What's taking so-" Edward stopped mid sentence when he turned around and saw his brother apparently kissing a little girl. His eyes bulged and his mouth dropped nearly to the ground. Not wanting to take in the horrifying scene any longer he turned is back to them. "Al!" He called even louder and even more annoyed.

Hearing Edward's voice snapped Alphonse out of his shocked state of mind and back to reality. Carefully placing Susan on the ground Alphonse said good bye one last time almost sounding sad as he forced himself to keep a tight lid on the confused emotions that had suddenly swelled up inside of him. "Brother, wait for me!" Alphonse road called chasing after him after turning around to see Edward already making his way off the path to house and onto the main.

"Bye, Al! Don't forget me!" Susan yelled smiling waving as Alphonse ran off after his brother.

When Alphonse finally caught up to his Edward the two walked in silence, Edward giving his younger brother dirty glances out of the corner of his left eye. "You're awfully quiet." Edward commented finally breaking the silence, at the same time trying to make sure he didn't get to close to him. Though it had been a little while and they were little ways from the small farming town Edward could not shake the image of his brother kissing a ten year old girl from his mind. Alphonse didn't respond, as he continued to walk with head held low his face not visible due to the long bangs that hung in the way hiding it. "You okay?" Edward asked becoming a little concerned.

"I'm fine." Alphonse answered in an unconvincing tone as he trailed just a few steps behind Edward who had stopped walking and was now passing.

Edward reached out and grabbed Alphonse just below the shoulder and pulled him back to get a better look at his brother's face. Another horrified look flickered across Edward's features before he started yelling. "What the hell are you blushing for?" Edward boomed startling a small flock of birds in the field nearby. Alphonse face was a burning red.

"It was my first kiss." Alphonse answered innocently turning his face from Edward as he brought his index finger and thumb to his lips. "To be honest I don't know how to feel."

"Ashamed, you should feel ashamed!" Edward yelled while pointing an accusing finger at his brother. "What the #$ were you thinking kissing her! You're five years her senior, she's a little girl, you moron!"

"I didn't kiss her she kissed me!" Alphonse shot back.

"Yeah? Then can you explain why you were holding her?" Edward questioned continuing to give his brother a dirty stare.

"She shocked me." Alphonse admitted in a small voice. He really had blanked out when Susan kissed him.

"Is that so?" Edward said looking at his brother through lowered eye lids, a frown on his lips.

"Why don't you believe me?" Alphonse questioned quietly, his feeling obviously hurt. "Brother, you jerk!" Alphonse shouted punching Edward, sending his brother into a ferocious series of midair cartwheels before he finally hit the ground, as he took off running down the road in tears.

To be continued…

Author's note;

**What's the deal with Susan?**

****

"She's a little perv that what!" I think would be a reader's reaction or "She's a little fast tailed girl!" or something like that. But despite how things seem the truth is she isn't either, she just discovered the opposite sex at a rather young age and it's all Al's fault! LOL Before he came along she couldn't stand men; in other words boys were gross and annoying. Would she be mad crushing on Ed if he weren't a woman? Not likely. Why? Because I said so. Ha! Besides, Edward is just not her type.


	7. Chapter 7

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Seven

Edward opened his eyes to see a squirrel staring down at him as it nibbled on an acorn. Giving the creature an angry glare with his odd colored eyes it scurried off. Edward moaned. How long had he been lying there and what was the strange taste in his mouth? Standing up he spit out a mouth full of grass and dirt. If anyone was around they surely would have seen the steam emanating from the top of his head and out of his ears. "AL!" Edward growled and took off in the direction they were headed in at top speed.

Alphonse sat in the middle of a patch of wild flowers still crying. It wasn't every day a fifteen year old boy's first kiss was stolen by a little girl. He was currently rebandaging his feet since all the running he did caused some of the wounds to break open and bleed again. After fixing his feet he sighed. Suddenly the field went silent and the little bird that was hopping around right beside him flew away. In the distance he could see the deer that was quietly grazing running away. This could only mean one thing. _"Edward" _Alphonse thought ducking out of the way of a swift punch and rolling so that he was at least a body's distance away from his brother, but that didn't last for long. Edward came charging at Alphonse at full speed to deliver a flying kick to the head. Alphonse caught his foot with both hands. Flipping over Edward kicked him in the chest instead, startling his brother enough for him to let go of his foot. Dropping to the ground Edward used his hands to flip himself back into a standing position only to end up dodging a series of swift kicks and punches. _"Damn_, e_ven with those injuries it seems he's gotten faster."_

It had been a while since they had spared and Edward was hoping that since Alphonse was back in his original body on top of the injuries to his feet that he had a chance of winning, but just as many times before when they spared it wasn't going to happen. Edward gave a small gasp when he barely missed a blow to the head, then twisted around in an attempt to punch Alphonse in the gut, but missed his target yet again. Instead Edward was the one to receive a blow to the gut and boy did it hurt. Clutching his stomach Edward came off his feet then hit the ground landing on his back with a heavy thud, the air completely knocked out of him. Alphonse chuckled to himself. When was Edward going to learn he couldn't win against him? An expression of concern soon came over his face when Edward didn't come charging at him again or declare that he gave up from his position on the ground.

"Brother?" Alphonse called running to his side. "Are you okay?" He asked looking at the crumpled mess on the ground which was his sibling. The battered figure only made pained noises. Had he over done it this time? "Brother?" Alphonse repeated kneeling on the ground next to him. Edward reached up placing a shaky hand on Alphonse's knee and pulled himself half way into a sitting position before slugging him in the stomach. Alphonse fell over and Edward with him and they both lay withering on the ground in pain.

"You just can't resist fighting dirty, can you?" Alphonse asked every word he spoke causing pain.

"Shaddup. At least you're not the one who's only living relative is child molester."

"You really think I'd do something like that?" Alphonse said sitting up, anger numbing the pain in his gut.

Edward was silent as if thinking about it.

"Ed!" Alphonse uttered becoming even angrier, his eyes welling up for another crying fit as he balled up his left fist to lay into his brother one last time.

"No, but how do you think it would have looked if Susan's grandfather saw you?" Edward said forcing himself to sit up. His hair had come undone during the fight and was hanging loose behind his shoulders. A worried look came over Alphonse's face as it turned blue, he and Edward fell back onto the ground like flowers wilting in the sun. "See what I mean?" Edward asked and Alphonse nodded his head. The old man probably would have killed him. "I don't see how you didn't see it coming." Edward said turning over on his back.

"How could I?" Alphonse asked turning on his side so that he could look over at Edward.

"You're the one always spouting all that garbage about true love and romance and whining about how you want a girlfriend." Edward said sweating bullets, the subject made him immensely uncomfortable.

Alphonse only gave a weary sigh that sounded more like a whine. "I guess in reality I'm just as dense as you are." Alphonse admitted.

"What was that?" Edward said jerking upward then grabbing his stomach in pain as he shriveled back down to the ground.

"Did I say that out loud?" Alphonse questioned knowing full well that he did and had meant to do so.

After a moment of licking the wounds inflicted on each other during the battle royal they called a sparing session the Elrics continued on their journey to the next town. Unfortunately for Alphonse Edward passed out only a quarter of the way away from the small town of Baskin, which was still a good long distance to travel by foot. People gave Alphonse strange looks as he walked into town carrying Edward on his back, but no one dared approach him. Maybe it was just how people behaved in this town keeping to themselves, minding their own or was it the angry looking frown on Alphonse's face? Either way it didn't matter. Perhaps Alphonse would have been more self conscious if he was paying attention, but he was too focused on finding an inn or hotel or someplace to rest for the time being. Edward seemed to have gained weight since the last time Alphonse found himself carrying him and coupled with the energy spent during their spar plus hiking through the great expanse of rolling hills and lush green fields that lay between Farmland and Baskin he was ready to lay down and not get up until dawn. It was moments like these when Alphonse found himself slightly missing his armored prison, for that body never became tired nor did it need to eat.

The sun had already gone down and the sky was in twilight by the time Alphonse found an inn. He had tried asking some of the locals where one was, but people either stared at him as they walked away or pretended not to hear him; the people in Baskin for the most part were just plain rude. The old man at the receptionist desk eyed the siblings curiously as Alphonse approached him. "One room, please." Alphonse politely requested pushing Edward back up on his back.

The old man continued eyeing them and this made Alphonse nervous. Was he going to deny them entry? "Is she going to be alright?" The old man finally asked even though he could care less about Edward's condition, he was actually more curious as to why two kids were wondering around so far from home. The old man could tell just by looking at them they weren't from around there; it was something about Alphonse's demeanor and the way he spoke plus the biggest clue of all people in the next town just a few miles away, never came to the hotel. Everyone practically knew or was related to someone in the other town so there was no need to stay in a hotel when you had a friend or family member's home to sleep in.

"How many nights?" The old receptionist asked before Alphonse could answer his first question.

"Just one." Alphonse answered and the old man handed them a key, though not before giving them a grim look. _"What was that about?" _Alphonse wondered as he made his way to their room. After fumbling with the lock for a minute Alphonse pushed the door open and once inside gently kicked it closed with his heel. Placing Edward in the twin bed closest to the door Alphonse collapsed on the one across from it.

The next day Alphonse just laid in bed looking up at the ceiling. His stomach was growling so loud it was causing his ears to ring. They hadn't eaten dinner the day before and it was now going on eleven o'clock in the morning. Edward was the only who could get them any food. Being a State Alchemist Edward usually just charged all their travel expenses to the military, of course it came out of his salary, but since the money just sat in an account piling up until he broke his automail again or ended up in a slump this usually wasn't a problem. Rolling over Alphonse looked at Edward then turned back to the wall. How could he still be asleep? Wouldn't the hunger pains have awaken him by now? Alphonse didn't bother trying to wake him up. Edward could have gun shoved in his face and still not budge. Perhaps if he whispered the word pipsqueak or shorty into his ear that would arouse him, however, Alphonse wasn't interested in having the stuffing beaten out of him by a half conscious Edward. Closing his eyes Alphonse let the growling of his stomach lull him back to sleep.

1 hour and 30 minutes later…

Edward woke up feeling a pain in is stomach. Groggily he walked into the small bathroom adjoined to the room consisting of only a toilet and a sink; the showers were further down the hall. Coming a little more out his sleep induced haze after splashing his face with water Edward suddenly became aware of a wet sensation between his legs. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead. Did he wet himself in his sleep? Edward quickly brought his hands to his behind to find it dry and the front wasn't wet either. Pulling down his pants he looked and something that should never ever be any a boy's box shorts, a red stain of blood. Biting his lower lip to keep a scream from escaping Edward grabbed a white wash cloth and stuffed it in his underwear and after washing his hands he immediately punched the mirror hanging over the face bowl shattering it. Edward had become completely unglued by the discovery. Only a few seconds before utterly breaking down Edward had told himself that he would handle the situation calmly and quietly so that no one would know about it, but Edward had never been one for subtlety and currently this was too much for him to handle.

"Ed?" Alphonse uttered, the shattering of the glass startling him out of sleep. Climbing out of bed Alphonse tripped hitting the floor. While he slept he had tossed and turned wrapping himself up in the sheets unknowingly. Hurriedly, Alphonse untangled himself from the bedding, scrambling back to his feet, and over to the bathroom door. "Brother?" He called again, but still received no answer.

Carefully Alphonse pushed the bathroom door open not knowing what to expect. Seeing blood on the floor Alphonse pushed the door open completely to find Edward balled up on the floor surrounded by broken glass holding his left hand, the source of the blood on the floor, it had been cut it pretty badly when he punched the mirror. Using alchemy Alphonse first cleared the shattered glass, restoring the mirror to its original state so that no further harm came to his sibling from the jagged pieces of glass laying around. Then grabbing a towel he wrapped Edward's bleeding hand in it along with some water he had transmuted into ice.

Edward seemed to be in state of shock, no matter what Alphonse did or said he wouldn't move from that spot on the floor or give any kind of response. If it weren't for the nearly inaudible sobbing Alphonse would have assumed he was unconscious. When Alphonse finally decided to just pick him up Edward recoiled even more making it difficult for his brother to remove him from the bathroom floor.

Placing Edward on the near the window. Alphonse sat down beside him. "Brother, please tell me what's wrong." Alphonse pleaded placing a hand on Edward's shoulder who turned red and rolled over curling up against the wall. He couldn't bring himself to say it because he couldn't bring himself to accept it and besides that it was embarrassing as hell. What words could he possibly use that would make it any less embarrassing? Alphonse was at a loss on what to do. He hadn't seen Edward in such a depressed state since nearly a month ago when they had first came out of the catacombs.

_"Oh!"Alphonse_ thought as it suddenly occurred to him why his brother was so upset. "Brother, I'm going to borrow you watch for a little while." Alphonse said, but Edward gave no response. Walking over to the bed his brother lay in the night before Alphonse took the watch from its position beside the pillow and left the room.

When Alphonse returned he found Edward kneeling on the bathroom floor, he had just finished cleaning up the blood from his little 'accident' and was now drying up the water with one of the extra towels he acquired from housekeeping.

"Brother…" Alphonse said nervously as he reached down to hand Edward a small paper bag.

"What's this?" Edward wondered out loud, in a sad voice. Looking down into the bag his eyes fill with tears and his cheeks flushed with embarrassment when saw what it contained. "Thanks." Edward said holding his head low so that his face wasn't visible.

"Are you going to be okay?" Alphonse asked feeling the downward shift in his brother's slightly uplifted spirits.

"Yeah, I think so." Edward replied standing up, keeping his face lowered.

"Okay." Alphonse said wearily as he closed the bathroom door behind himself as he exited. Once alone in the tiny room Edward let the tears flow silently as he removed the contents of the paper bag. Pulling off his pants and hanging them on the door knob Edward removed the blood stained draws and wash cloth and sat them on fire.

"Ed?" Alphonse called worriedly from the other side of the door when he saw the smoke coming from underneath the bathroom door.

"I'm okay." Edward responded as he made use of the bag's contents. Never had Edward imagined himself wearing women's underwear least of all needing to make use of feminine hygiene products. Looking at the last thing he had pulled from the bag he frowned. At arms length Edward held a pink bra between his thumb and index finger as if holding something dirty. Remembering Edward complaining about his chest on several different occasions Alphonse picked up the article of clothing along with the matching panties after stopping by the local drug store. The clerk at the register, along with a few other people in the store at the time, gave him a dirty looks as he placed the items on the counter but said nothing to him.

_"I might as well put it on too since I'm already wearing girl pants." _Edward thought letting out a heavy sigh before taking off his shirt.

Alphonse lay on the bed closest to the door dangling Edward's gold pocket watch above his face. Hearing the bathroom door open Alphonse sat up. Edward closed the door then sat down on the other bed with a huff.

"Hey, how did you know it would fit?" Edward asked not caring to make eye contact with his brother.

"I could just tell." Alphonse answered.

"Is that so?" Edward said peering at him through narrowed eyes. Edward would never admit it but the bra fit too comfortably for it to be a lucky guess and was wondering if his brother hadn't measured him while he was asleep or something.

"I could just tell by looking." Alphonse said catching the look his brother was giving him and knowing exactly what he was thinking.

"That's even more disturbing." Edward said lying down and turning his back to him.

Alphonse sweat dropped. Was really it that strange he made an accurate guess? "Brother, aren't you hungry?" Alphonse asked as he watched Edward recoil again.

"No." He answered in a low tone.

"Brother you have to eat something." Alphonse said concerned. Edward was never one to skip a meal even when he was feeling particularly depressed and considering how long it had been since they had last ate this sudden change in appetite definitely worried him.

"I just don't feel like eating right now."

"Okay." Alphonse said reluctantly as he stood up and left the room alone.

Edward hadn't budged from his position on the bed one centimeter since his brother left in search of food. It was bad enough he was bleeding uncontrollably, but on top of it his gut was hurting as if someone had stabbed him in it. Before he today he would get through each day just telling himself it was only how he looked on the out side that there was no way that thing had completely turned him into a woman. He told himself that as many times as it took to make it through each day, but now he could no longer deny truth; that he was indeed completely a woman through and through just as if he were born that way. Edward was going to start crying again when he heard the door open and quickly sucked it in.

"What are you doing back so early?" He asked sounding almost angry. It was only fifteen minutes since Alphonse had left the room and if he had gone to have a meal at local pub or someplace there was no way he would have made it back there so quickly.

"I bought something for us to eat from the deli a few buildings down." Alphonse said opening the large bag of food and pulling out a sandwich. "Brother, please eat something." He said walking over to the bed in which his sibling lay.

Groaning Edward turned over and sat up. "Fine." He said snatching the sandwich from Alphonse's hand and taking a bite. Alphonse sat down next to him smiling. "What?" Edward asked with a mouth full of food when he saw his brother staring at him out the corner of his eye.

"Uh-um, nothing!" Alphonse said opening the bag and sticking whatever he grabbed into his mouth and continued to do so until he was full. Edward had given him quiet a scare and he didn't know what he would do if his 'brother' refused to eat.

"You know," Edward swallowed before continuing. "I'm just going to have to deal with it for now." Edward said as he ate. _"My goal was to get you back into your body and you are. I should be happy, but I can't live in this body for the rest of my life. I wasn't born this way and I don't want to stay this way. I'll find a way to go back to my original body as well, but when I do I don't want you anywhere around, because if I fail I don't want you getting caught up in it."_

_ "We were supposed to be restored together. I can't stand to see you in such pain, so even if I have to sacrifice myself I will gladly do so if it meant you would no longer have to live in such pain."_

To Be Continued

Author's Note:

**Do you hate Ed?**

No, not really, I just like Alphonse more, I think. He's a sweet heart, way more graceful than his brother, plus he's so darn adorable! (Kind of like those stray cats he keeps picking up) I can't help but go "awe" and neither can you, just admit it! So, yeah he is always going to be the star in my stories. LOL, I kind of liked the idea of Arakawasensei renaming her manga "Armor Alchemist"


	8. Chapter 8

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Eight

It had taken them a little while but they had finally made it to Central. What the siblings were going to do next had not yet been decided, as far as Edward was concerned. When they arrived in the city it was early afternoon and Edward was still not quite ready to face anyone in the military particularly the Flame Alchemist Colonel Roy Mustang. How would he explain his sudden change of gender?

_"I've always been a woman!"_ Edward imagined himself declaring, but he knew he could never make such a statement without it sounding like an obvious lie. _"It was an accident!" _No way Edward would admit to that and reveal that he had performed another botched human transmutation to that bastard. No way! _"They did this to me! Damn those bastards!" _Edward imagined himself saying as he produced tears that were half fake and half real. Yeah, they'd buy that, after all the military had lost contact with him shortly after he entered the catacombs. He could say that he had successfully returned Alphonse to his true body, but was kidnapped and used as a guinea pig in horrifying experiments of alchemy. That rat bastard colonel wouldn't dare make fun of him then and he had to admit it did seem like a pretty good cover.

"Hehe." Edward chuckled drawing his brother's attention.

"What's so funny?" Alphonse asked as they walked along to the nearest hotel.

"Nothing," Edward said not turning to face his brother. Alphonse hardly ever got his sense of humor and truth be told Edward was wondering if he even had a sense of humor at all. Alphonse was hardly ever seen with out a smile or at least a content expression on his face, but whenever Edward attempted to crack a joke a blank look came over the boy's face as if Edward just told him someone had died.

"How are you feeling?" Alphonse asked for the tenth time that day.

"I'm fine quit asking me that. If I pass out again then you'll know I'm not fine." Edward said annoyed at his younger brother's constant questioning; how are you feeling, do you need to rest, are you hungry, are you thirsty? Alphonse was behaving more like a worried mother than a little brother and this irritated Edward to no end.

During the train ride to Central Edward had fainted again. At first Alphonse thought he had just fallen asleep when his brother's head fell over on his shoulder, but it soon became clear that his sibling was not in any normal state of sleep. _"Why doesn't he tell me what's wrong?" _Alphonse wondered. _"Is it that bad? Then wouldn't that be all the more reason to tell me what's going on?"_

Once checked into a room Edward instructed Alphonse to wait in there for him while he went to ruin some kind of secret errand, no doubt a run to the pharmacy to purchase medicine for his mysterious illness is what Alphonse suspected. He just hoped his brother didn't pass out again. Having nothing to do or rather not being able to do much since he told Edward he would wait for him to return he busied himself by taking a shower and washing the clothes he was wearing by hand. Not wanting to wait for them to dry he clapped his hands together using alchemy to heat up the air and dry the cloths. The room quickly filled up with steam causing his hair to frizz up. Perhaps that wasn't such a good idea. After putting on the now dry cloths Alphonse opened a window. People on the street below noticed the clouds of steam and mistook them for smoke. After that it didn't take long for hotel staff to come barging in fire extinguishers in hand.

"Steam?" One of the staff said immediately feeling the dampness in the atmosphere of the room.

"Eh, sorry about that." Alphonse apologized to the man pretending to have just gotten out of the shower. He had quickly undressed and had a towel tied around his waist. He didn't want to have to explain how he was an alchemist. Though such a thing would have more than likely went unnoticed it still could have raised the militaries suspicions and draw unwanted attention to Edward. "I guess I used too much hot water." He said sheepishly.

"Oh, well thank goodness then!" the man said lowering his fire extinguisher. "People from the street reported smoke coming from one of the rooms. I'm just glad it was a misunderstanding. Just try not to boil yourself in here young man." The man laughed as he turned to exit the room. "Come along Julia." He said to a woman holding an extinguisher that was obviously a subordinate. At the moment Juilia was too busy staring. When the steam cleared a bit more Alphonse was able to see the young woman and his heart jumped in his throat.

"Come along Juilia!" The man said once again with more force as he locked arms with the woman and dragged her from the room. "Enjoy your stay." The man said as he closed the door.

While extremely conservative in dress Edward may not have had too much of an issue with being stripped down to his boxes in public nor running around Pinnako's property half naked, but Alphonse was very particular about people seeing him less than fully clothed and was currently trying to keep his heart from pounding from the utter terror of knowing that a woman had saw him in nothing but a towel. Maybe he should have considered that as a possibility before acting on his great idea, but there was no time to give the plan that much thought. Sitting on the bed Alphonse started to comb his hair down and carefully braided it to keep it from frizzing up again.

When Edward returned the room was steam free and Alphonse was fully dressed coat and all. "What took you so long?" Alphonse lightly demanded.

"Why? Were you in a hurry to go someplace?" Edward asked. Alphonse was hardly ever in a hurry to do anything. Edward was the one usually rushing about.

"Well, no I was just tired of waiting on you." Alphonse said not stating the full truth.

"Haha, well cheer up; I bought something for you." Edward said with a huge grin on his face as he placed a shopping back beside his brother who looked at it wearily. "Go on, I didn't get you anything for your birthday since we were you know, trapped in that hell whole those people call a city."

"Thank you." Alphonse said reaching into the bag. Alphonse sweat dropped when saw what his brother had given him; a red coat identical to his own complete with a black button down shirt and black pants. "Brother…" Alphonse started at a lose for words. Since when have they ever dressed alike?

"Cool, huh?" Edward said as he walked over too Alphonse and gave him a bear hug.

"Yeah, thanks." Alphonse said not wanting to seem ungrateful. Truth was while he did admire his brother he never once wanted to dress like him.

"Go ahead and put 'em on!" Edward coaxed. "Aren't you sick of running around in those oversized clothes anyway?" He said pointing at Alphonse's current attire, a pair of brown pants and a white button down shirt with matching brown coat. While taller than Edward Alphonse was still on the short side himself and Brawly's never ending supply of white shirts and brown trousers hung rather loosely on the boy's small, thin frame.

Alphonse had taken off the coat and unbuttoned his shirt when he suddenly started feeling uncomfortable.

"What's wrong?" Edward questioned giving his brother a quizzical look.

_"Why am I all of a sudden conscious of the fact my brother is now a girl?"_ Alphonse thought as he shook his head. "Nothing, I guess I'm just hungry he said hurriedly undressing and dressing in the clothes given to him as a birthday present. To his surprise the clothes actually suited him.

"Yeah! Now we look like a team!" Edward said hanging on Alphonse's shoulder as he looked in the mirror and give a thumbs up.

Early the next morning Edward marched over to military headquarters to report to Mustang. He was finally ready to face him and give a heart wrenching performance as he explained how he was experimented on and left in his current condition.

"What do you mean he's not here?" Edward demanded as he yelled at the receptionist at the front desk.

"I'm sorry Miss, but Brigadier General Mustang is at East Headquarters." The woman said keeping her composure even though she wanted to tell Edward off, but since he outranked her she held her tongue.

"What did you say?" Edward hissed.

"Brigadier General Mustang-"

"No $# Way!" Edward said his mouth nearly hitting the floor. _"How did that bastard get another promotion?" _Edward wondered as he walked hunched over out of the building.

"Stop that!" Edward chastised snatching a small back of sunflower seeds from his brother and stuffing it his coat pocket when he found him sitting on the stairs feeding pigeons.

"Brother!" Alphonse uttered in surprise.

"Stop giving food to vermin! Shoo!" Edward roared chasing the birds away. "Get lost you disease ridden little bastards!"

"Are you ok, Ed?" Alphonse asked standing up.

"No, I'm not okay! That thing just got promoted to Brigadier!" Edward boomed.

"We should congratulate him them." Alphonse said nonchalantly.

"The hell we are!" Edward fumed as he stomped down the stairs. "I'm hungry, let's go eat."

"What about you're report?"

"He isn't here."

"Wha-?"

"He's in East City so I guess will head there later on today.

Alphonse's eyes popped open as if Edward had said something utterly wrong.

"You comin'?" Edward asked when he looked back and saw his brother still in the same spot he found him in.

"No I'm not really hungry right now. I think I'll go take a look around."

"Fine, suit yourself." Edward mumbled as he walked off.

Once Edward was out of site Alphonse immediately went inside the military building.

After eating so much he gave himself a tummy ache Edward wearily made his way back to the hotel and went to sleep. It was twelve thirty in the afternoon when he finally begin to stir. At the same time Alphonse just so happened to be making his way back to their room with an utterly pleased look on his face.

"What you smilin' about?" Edward asked suspicious.

"I'm just happy." Alphonse replied sitting down on his bed.

"You better not have picked up another stray animal." Edward growled.

"No, I didn't." Alphonse said looking over his shoulder then turning back around. "We should get something to eat."

"I had a big breakfast, I'm not hungry." Edward replied walking over and sitting down behind his brother.

"Hey!" Alphonse exclaimed when he suddenly felt Edward's hands groping about his body.

"Where is? I know you have one!" Edward shouted.

"I told you didn't pick up any animals today." Alphonse snapped as he struggled to get away from Edward.

"Then what are you hiding?"

"Get off of me! What's wrong with you, Ed?"

"My only living relative is lying to me, that's what!" Edward said tightening the vice grip he had put on Alphonse as he attempting to flip him over, but maneuver backfired and they both ended up on the floor. Edward had landed on top of Alphonse knocking the wind out of him and apparently had done a bit more damage than just that judging by the way his eyes were swirling around in his head. Now rendered completely helpless Edward was going to take full advantage of the situation and find out what Alphonse was trying so desperately to hide from him.

"Room service," said the cheerful voice of the hotel maid as she pushed her cleaning cart into the room. When she looked upon what seemed like an intimate moment being interrupted by her barging in she apologetically and quickly excused herself from the room.

"It's not like that!" Edward shouted as he dashed out into the hallway. "Get back here and do your job!" He shouted again to no avail. "Awe, damn it!" He cursed scratching his head in frustration as he went back into the room. Alphonse was just recovering from the monster tackle when Edward's signature screaming pierced his ears.

"PULL IT TOGETHER, WE'RE LEAVING RIGHT NOW!" Grabbing Alphonse by the wrist he quickly paid for the stay at the front desk then hightailed it to the station in order to be five hours early the next train headed to East City that afternoon.

"Why do we have to be here so early?" Alphonse complained halfheartedly as they aimlessly roamed the train station. He wasn't found of the idea of staying in the hotel a moment longer either, but for a completely different reason (he was too dazed to realize the current embarrassing situation Edward had gotten them into).

"You're acting strange." Edward said airily. Alphonse had never been one to voice complaints too often, except when it came to Edward sleeping with his stomach exposed.

"Hm, maybe I need a nap." Alphonse said out loud. The truth was he was hoping to confront Edward in private as to why he was constantly passing out, now that they were in a bustling train station all hopes of that were lost and Alphonse had somewhat lost his nerve to ask. Once the train to East City finally arrived and was ready for boarding the siblings found an empty car, as was their custom, and sat down- Edward rather laid down as was his custom. Looking over at his brother's relaxing as best he could on the hard wood seat Alphonse sighed thinking that maybe it would be best to let Edward tell him in his own time.

The train came to a jolting halt once it reached East City waking Edward from his slumber. Wanting to believe that everything that had taken place up to that point was nothing more than a twisted dream he kept his eyes closed waiting for it to end. He and Alphonse were both in their proper bodies and he was most definitely not wearing women's underwear, but the well supported weight on his chest said otherwise. _"This isn't the body I was born in." _Edward thought as a heavily cloud of depression suddenly overtook him.

"Brother, here's our stop." Alphonse said gently shaking him.

"Yeah." Edward slurred getting up and draping the coat over his back he had been using as a pillow. He did after all rush all the way to East City to report to Mustang so he could start his research on bio-alchemy without that Flaming General on his mind.

The siblings walked in silence as the exited the train station. The late after afternoon sun hung low in the sky glinting off the fresh wax job on the limousine that passed them as they walked. One of the back windows was down and Alphonse couldn't help but feel that who ever was behind that window was watching him. Following the limo with his eyes until it rounded a corner Alphonse didn't notice a group of large, muscular roughnecks approaching them. Edward had continued walking not paying anything any attention until the would-be bandits blocked his path.

"Excuse me." Edward said in a humdrum tone not even looking up to make eye contact.

"Hey you're kind of cute." The tallest of the thugs said with a wide smile revealing missing teeth that were more than likely knocked out during a fight. He proudly showed off his hairy muscular arms and chest muscles by wearing a tight faded purple t-shirt and a pair of almost equally tight blue jeans. The thug also wore a blue bandana over a scalp full of dirty hair. If he had on an eye path it was more than certain he'd be mistaken for a pirate.

_"Uh-oh."_Alphonse thought keeping his distance as he was certain there was going to be a throw down and he didn't want to get hit by any flying bodies.

"Hey, why don't you come with us?" The thug offered still smiling.

"Fine." Edward moaned in the same half dead tone of voice he used before. Grinning the man grabbed him by the wrist and proceeded to walk off, but before he could even move a step he felt a hard whack on the back of hand and out of reflex he let go of Edward's wrist.

"You aren't taking this person anywhere." Alphonse said sternly as he stood protectively in front of his brother.

"Al?" Edward murmured as if slowly coming out of a dream.

"The lady said she wanted to come with me! Out of the way pipsqueak!" The man said knocking Alphonse to the side and violently grabbing Edward by the wrist again who's eyes grew five times their normal size, but before he could carry the dazed and confused teenager away he found himself sprawled on the ground after receiving a powerful blow to the head which incidentally knocked out another one of his teeth. Alphonse had delivered a powerful high kick to the thugs head. Usually there was no need to get violent since his overbearing size and glowing eyes were more enough to stop anyone or anything in their tracks when he told them to leave his brother alone, but Alphonse was no longer contained with a monstrous suit of armor that could easily intimidate people and animals alike. Alphonse was in his rightful body which appeared to be more frail than it actually was.

"Brother! Were you really going to go with them?" Alphonse asked concerned. Edward just looked at him as if in a trance. "Brother, snap out of it!" Alphonse pleaded shaking him.

"Hey, kid did you say 'brother'?" One of the four other thugs asked, he too also had missing teeth.

"Yes, why do you want to know?" Alphonse said putting on his fight face.

The other three mummered amongst themselves in utter disbelief and the man on the ground turned to stone. "So you mean those are fake?" The second thug asked curiously in reference to Edward's chest.

An evil look came over Alphonse's face for split second before he replied. "No, they're real." He confirmed casually.

"Then that's really your sister!" The thug said accusingly.

"No, he is my brother."

"Then you mean that person has both?" The thug asked quivering as if he were afraid.

"Yes, but please don't tell anybody." Alphonse requested with false pleading eyes.

"Boss, pull it together. We're out of here!" The only vocal thug said grabbing the man on the ground by the neck of his shirt and hauling him away at the speed of light.

Alphonse sighed before turning to his brother with an angry expression on his face. He wanted to punch Edward square in the jaw and make him snap out of it with a good hit or two, but taking in the expression on Edward's face Alphonse knew his special brand of tough love wouldn't work on him this time except to make an already bad situation worse.

"Al, I really am a freak aren't I?" Edward questioned as tears begin to fall from his eyes. "I hate this! I hate being like this! I don't even know if I can reverse it. I might end up spending my entire life in this body." Edward said as he kept his arms tightly clenched around his body as it violent trembled. Reaching out Alphonse wrapped his arms around Edward who begin to openly wail. The streets had filled up considerably since the siblings' encounter with the gang and people were not able to go about their business without staring. Closing his eyes Alphonse pulled Edward closer.

"It will be okay. You can make it through this. We'll figure out a way to get your body back." Alphonse whispered into his brother's ear and though filled with determination the words had little effect on Edward's current state of mind.

_"You really are stronger than I am. I don't know how you did it living in that tin can for five years, but you did. I can't even remember you complaining, not once and here I am falling to pieces. At least I'm in a human body. I'm glad you have faith in me because right now that only makes one of us."_ Edward thought as he unfolded his arms and hugged Alphonse back.

To Be Continued

**Author's Note**; As promised answers to questions.

**Directly** quoting Chemical Love- "Is the story set on Earth or does FMA in anohter realitiy."

**Answer**: Hmm, okay I think I get what you're trying to ask here so let me respond;

This story takes place in the Hagaren world not Earth and no, it's not an alternate universe fic. I'm sorry for not being specific about where they are early on, that's mainly because I don't have a good map of the Hagaren world, but I imagine they started their journey back to central on the western outskirts of Ametris (otherwise Al would not have been able to use Ed's gold pocket watch to make purchases in Basken). I have no clue what towns and things exist in that area so I made up some places for them to be; the scary wilderness of open fields and forests, Farmland, and Basken.

**And here's another** that I found in my review section from Ellen Tee; "PS, have you read Ranma 1/2, any chance?"

**Answer:** First I want to say thank you; I'm glad you think my Hagaren fan fiction isn't just another piece of perversion floating around on the internet (hopefully later chapters won't make you change your mind). Now to answer your question yes, I read few volumes, but found that I liked the anime more. LOL Nudity abounds, but in no way does it come off as pornographic. I think Ranma is probably the only anime that has a lot of nudity that isn't hentai. Even so, I wouldn't recommend this anime to everyone- not everyone can handle Ranma. While I enjoyed Ranma1/2 very much in no way is this story based on it.

**What inspired this story?**

A particular something in Arakawasan's manga inspired the title… and some absolutely horrifying things I saw while looking for some cool Hagaren pics on the web that got me thinking "what if Ed really were a girl? What would he do if he were transformed into a full fledged woman through and through?" inspired the story.


	9. Chapter 9

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Nine

Suddenly feeling uncomfortable Alphonse opened his eyes noticing the darting glances of by-passers. As a living suit of armor Alphonse had come to accept that people would stare since it's not everyday you see someone walking around in full armor and was just thankful that no one got too curious and kept their distance for the most part, but now there was no reason for the stares that he could see. Suddenly Edward's body went limp in his arms. _"Not again." _Alphonse sweat dropped as he hoisted Edward over his back under curious gazes then made his way to the hotel down the street.

Edward was coming to just as Alphonse entered their room. Groaning he opened his eyes to get a good view of the floor and his brother's backside. "Hey, the blood has all drained into my head."

"Sorry, Brother." Alphonse said setting Edward on his feet who almost fell over backward from dizziness. Luckily Alphonse caught his arms and helped him balance. "Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine, just need to sit down for a while." Edward said plopping down on the foot of the bed. The truth was Edward was feeling as if he would pass out again. "Geez, it's hot in here." He said unzipping his shirt and taking it off.

"Ed! What are you doing?" Alphonse nearly shouted. He had sat down beside him, but had bolted to the other end side of the bed when Edward started stripping.

"Relaxing," Edward said pulling off his pants and tossing them to the other side of the room straight into the chair where the rest of his clothes were flung. Falling back on the bed Edward let out a heavy sigh. Alphonse had almost immediately busied himself neatly hanging the cloths up in the closet.

_"How many girls just take off their clothes in front of their brothers like that?" _Alphonse wondered as he turned on the radio pretending to listen to the broadcast as he sat at the desk with his back turned to Edward. _"Winry never took her clothes off in front of us, but Winry isn't our sister and Ed is actually my brother… though in that body that's not really true anymore. He's acting as did before for the most part. Brother knows he's a girl now, but I don't think he's fully accepted it yet. And I have? I'm a horrible brother!" _Alphonse thought as he grabbed his head with both hands and started sulking.

"Hey we should go check it out." Edward said propping himself up on his left arm.

"Huh?" Alphonse uttered lifting his head.

"The commercial for the bath house that just opened up here, we should go check it out."

"Yeah." Alphonse agreed keeping his back turned, he was so focused on mentally berating himself he didn't hear the advertisement.

"First thing in the morning before anyone else can get there." Edward said enthusiastically.

"Hm-hmm." Alphonse responded then stood up. "I'm going to get something to eat." He said stiffly hoping Edward would want to come along which meant he would have to put his cloths back on.

"Bring me back something." Edward said rolling over and closing his eyes.

Alphonse flinched as if someone had dropped a ton of brick on his head. At least he'd be able to get away from the room for a little while without seeming suspicious. "Okay." He agreed and left.

It was only after a twenty minute nap that Edward realized that his gold watch was lying on the floor. When he awoke he had looked down and saw it on the floor between the bed and the night stand. "Oops can't start being so careless with this now." Edward said picking it up along with the wallet that had ended up on the floor with it. Then it hit him. How was Alphonse going to pay for the food without any money and more importantly why hadn't he come back to get it? While in Central he had made a quick stop by the bank for some traveling money. Even though he could have just flashed his watch and have whatever purchases he made charged to his military account Edward was extremely uncomfortable doing so and not every town welcomed military personal, not to mention he didn't even truly consider himself one of them. Being a State Alchemist was simply a means to and end. Sitting on the bed Edward's face turned a bright red as a frown overtook his features.

_"I'm going to kill him!" _Edward thought as he sat boiling. _"I'm going to wait and when he comes back I'm going to murder him, because if I go find him now there will be witnesses."_

Forty more minutes had passed before Alphonse wearily made his way back to the hotel. Before leaving the restaurant he had ordered Edward something to eat and was carrying the still warm meal in a paper bag. Alphonse had barely touched the door knob when the door flew open and he was grabbed in before he could blink.

"Explain yourself!" Edward demanded.

"Sorry, I took so long." Alphonse apologized handing Edward the bag who snatched it away and angrily removed the food and started eating. "You know if you had come with me-"

"That's not what I was talking about!" Edward growled as he greedily finished off the pork chow mein. "You!..." Edward started, but grabbed his stomach and sat back down on the bed. _"Guess it wasn't a good idea to just swallow everything like that, but I was hungry and I can't kick his ass on an empty stomach."_ Edward thought as he took a minute out from his angry rampage to recover from eating nearly a quart of food in less than two minutes.

"Brother?" Alphonse said concerned taking a cautious step toward him, but quickly backed up when Edward looked up at him with an enraged expression glued onto his face.

"How could you, even after I told you not to? Edward demanded as he stomped over to Alphonse who was backing away in tune with each step Edward took toward him. They were standing face to face and Alphonse's back was to the door.

"I didn't pick up any strays today, honest." Alphonse said holding up his hands.

"Don't play innocent! How did you pay for this stuff? You left right out of here without my wallet so how did you pay for it?"

_"How could I have been so careless?" _Alphonse thought. _"I was in such a hurry to get out of here I totally let that slip my mind. He must be really upset because he didn't come after me like he usually does when I do something to upset him. This means he's really going to lay into me for this one, but what choice did I have?"_

"Resign! Quit right now!" Edward shouted.

"No, I can't do that." Alphonse solemnly refused.

"You mean you won't. If I can't talk any sense into you then I guess I'll have to beat it into you!" Edward said attacking his brother who ducked and moved away from the door.

"You can't do that you'll disturb the other guests." Alphonse pointed out hoping to stay Edward's rage to no avail as the teen continued his onslaught, so much for no witnesses. Alphonse continued to dodge and block his attacks until his foot slipped on the rug by the bed and he fell back onto it. Edward wasted no time pouncing on him and before he could raise a hand to strike him the door to their room flew open.

"Is there a problem?" A male hotel staff member asked from the door with his back turned. The Elric's room was between two unoccupied rooms so despite the commotion within the room no one else heard or was disturbed by it. The staff member just so happened to be passing their room when he heard what sounded like a violent struggle and thought maybe a thief or something was attacking whoever was in the room. When he opened the door he ended up misinterpreted what was going on when he saw Edward on top of Alphonse practically naked.

"No, and can't you see we're in the middle of something? Get out already!" Edward boomed."

"Hm, yes. Please excuse my interruption. Enjoy your stay." The man said quickly closing the door and going about his business.

"Now where was I?" Edward said out loud looking down at Alphonse. "Awe, damn it, Al," Edward noisily uttered as he got off of Alphonse letting him up and sat beside him. Edward couldn't bring himself to mercilessly pound the crap out of his little brother even if he thought he did deserve it, but he wasn't going to let him off that easy. An evil expression came across Edward's face as he balled up his left hand and punched Alphonse in the stomach as hard as he could. Letting out a sound that sounded somewhat like a squeak Alphonse toppled head first onto the floor.

"It's bad enough I'm caught up in the military and have to do God only knows what at their command, but now you're caught up in it too. I was hoping you could at least remain safe, that if someone's hands had to get dirty that at least yours would remain clean. Why did you do it? Why couldn't you have just stayed away like I told you to?" Edward questioned his voice quivering, but he held in the tears that threatened to fall.

"…I…I just couldn't…let you do it… all on… you own." Alphonse whispered from his position on the floor. It hurt to breath and considering how hard Edward had hit him it hurt to think; now he expected him to talk?

"You could have continued helping me as you always did and you still haven't given me a good reason for this." Edward said flatly.

"It was because… I can't… I can't truly help… if I'm restricted." Alphonse said still struggling to speak. _"I can't stand seeing you in such pain. If we both have access to restricted material then the research on how to change you back would go much faster. Brother, I can no longer let you go at it alone like this especially with your health the way it is now. You have secrets you're keeping from me too that I wish you'd tell me, so I just hope you can accept this for now. Besides it's not like I was all that innocent to begin with."_ Alphonse thought as he quivered on the floor. _"Like you said that person we created may not have been our mother, but we still pulled him into this world and caused him to live a horrible existence even if it was only for a few minutes before he died. You say you killed him, but if it had been the other way around I don't see how I would have done much differently." _

Edward sat on the bed looking down at Alphonse's quivering body as he thought things through. He was still very upset with him for doing what he did, but it was his choice no matter how foolish of one it may have been. No one had beat him up when he decided to become a State Alchemist and even though she could have Pinako didn't stop him. Even though she strongly disagreed with his methods she did everything she could to enable him to accomplish that goal by outfitting him with her best automail work. "I'm sorry." Edward solemnly apologized.

"I… it's okay." Alphonse tried to assure, but when Edward took a better look he noticed a small puddle of blood on the floor under Alphonse's face and nearly had a heart attack

"No it's not okay! You're bleeding!" Edward screamed as he rushed to pick him up off the floor.

"Just a little…" Alphonse said not aware of the constant stream of blood falling out of his mouth. Edward ran to the bathroom to get a washcloth.

"Stop talking!" Edward commanded as he held the washcloth to his brother's face then leaned him back against the bed. Lifting up his shirt Edward could see a nasty, large black and blue bruise on his abdomen. Alphonse let out a painful whine when Edward touched it, his eyes swirling.

"EEEE! Don't you dare die on me! Edward screamed slapping his hand over his brother's mouth as what looked like a ghost tried to come floating up out of it. Edward's heart was pounding so fast his chest felt as if it would explode and the sound of it made his ears ring. Picking Alphonse up Edward ran out of the hotel like gust of wind to the hospital.

It was after 2 a.m. when Alphonse came to. Aside from the nasty bruise Edward had given him he had a slight concussion from falling over on the floor like he did. When the doctor's asked how it happened Edward shamefully admitted that they had gotten into a fight. This of course resulted in strange looks from the doctors who of course talked about him like a dog, but as long as Alphonse was going to be okay he didn't care, after all it wasn't like he didn't hit him which resulted in his falling and gaining a concussion to go along with the internal injuries he had given him. Edward had refused to leave the hospital and though weary about doing so the doctors let him stay in the room with Alphonse. Currently he sat fast asleep beside the bed, his head resting on the mattress beside his brother's body.

"Ed." Alphonse called weakly. "Brother." He called again lifting his hand to shake him, but found it near impossible to move beyond a slight wiggle. _"What's wrong with me?" _He thought still struggling to sit up.

"Huh?" Edward said waking up. "Al? Al! Are okay?" Edward asked relieved. Before Alphonse could answer the alarm clock sitting in Edward's lap went off, its annoying ring immediately starting to give Edward a head ache. "Damn!" Edward said unable to find the off switch and instead clapped his hands together using alchemy to break it into a million tiny pieces. "I'm supposed to wake you up for fifteen minutes every hour. They gave me this stupid piece of crap just in case I fell asleep. The nurse said she'd check in on you anyway. I guess they don't trust me." Edward said sweat dropping. Just as he was finishing his sentence the nurse appeared turning on the lights in the room.

"Oh! You're awake." She said surprised when she saw Alphonse's open eyes.

"Yeah, just like the time before, and the time before that and the time before that, need I go on?" Edward questioned angrily.

The nurse gave him a dirty look before addressing Alphonse. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, I think, but I can't move my arms and legs."

"Oh, that's because of all the morphine we gave you. It should wear off sooner or later." She said as she took his temperature for the eighth time that night. "Glad to see you're fully aware this time around." She said taking his blood pressure.

"This time?" Alphonse asked trying one last time to sit up.

"Yes, you've been here since six thirty last night."

"Last night?" Alphonse said the panic evident in her voice.

"Don't worry, it's only a little after 2 a.m. you haven't even been here a twelve hours yet."

"How did I get here?"

"Your sister apparently carried you here half naked." The nurse said giving Edward a disdainful glance. _"I can't believe that little amazon monster would do such a thing to such a sweet boy."_

"Ed?" Alphonse said turning his attention to his brother who was wearing a hospital robe and slippers.

"I guess I'll leave you two alone now." The nurse said excusing herself from the room.

"I'm so tired…" Alphonse said closing his eyes.

"Ah! No! I mean you can't! Stay awake! Stay awake!" Edward shouted running from one side of the bed to the other.

Alphonse gave a small giggle. "I'm okay, really." He said trying to close his eyes again, but Edward wouldn't let him be.

The nurse smiled to herself as she stood listening outside the door. _"I guess it's okay to really leave them alone." _She thought as she walked away.

"Al, I'm sorry." Edward finally said.

"It's okay." Alphonse assured.

"How can you say that when it's my fault you're in here?" Edward demanded. "I really am a jerk."

"Brother, do you remember when I accidentally broke six of your ribs when we were sparing one time?"

"That was a long time ago… you hadn't even been in the armor a year yet and you were still trying to get accustomed to that body. I just lost my temper and hurt the person I care about the most." Edward added sadly.

"Ed, we both know you're a jerk, but I'm not bothered by it so it's okay." Alphonse said with a smile, even though he did believe his brother to be "high maintenance" he had only called Edward a jerk as a joke

"That's a load off." Edward said sarcastically. "Just because you're okay with me being the biggest asshole in the world doesn't make what I did to you okay! Damn it Al, why do you have to be like this?" Edward asked breaking down into tears. Edward knew Alphonse wouldn't take even a quarter of the crap from anyone else he took from him, he knew if it were someone else he wouldn't be laying in that bed saying it was okay that they put him there. As far as Edward was concerned it was worse that it was him and not someone else that put him there yet here he was saying it was okay. It had always been like this. Edward knew how much his brother suffered being in that armored prison yet he was always there comforting him whenever he woke up in the middle of the night from nightmares or the pain the artificial limbs caused him. He hated how his little brother constantly kept watch over him because more than anything it was a testament to what a failure he was to him as a big brother. He was supposed be the one watching out for him not the other way around.

Alphonse watched his brother's body heave as he sat with his head face down on the mattress. He could tell by the labored breathing that he was crying again. There was a time when Alphonse thought that if Edward let it out every once and while that he wouldn't feel so burdened, but now he didn't know what to believe since Edward had been sadder and shedding more tears then he had ever seen or expected to see seen since their mother died and at that moment more than anything Alphonse wished the doctor's had not pumped him full of pain killers because despite the pain he might have been at least able to give his brother a hug.

_"Ed, I love you. Who will if I don't? You said yourself all we have is each other. It's not because I feel it's an obligation, it's because I want to. Ed, I love you no matter what happens."_ Alphonse thought as he forced himself not to cry. "Ed, nothing can break the bond we have. Brother, do you hear me?" Alphonse said trying to sit up again to find he was no more capable of doing so than the last few times he tried. "Nothing can break the bond we have, nothing." Alphonse said his words an inaudible whisper as he drifted back into slumber.

During the night, partly out of guilt and worry, and partly because his back had begun to hurt sitting in the chair the way he was, Edward had climbed into the small twin sized bed with Alphonse. He lay on his side squished between the bed rail and Alphonse's body. It wasn't exactly the best resting position, but at least his back could get somewhat of a break.

"Morning..." A nurse said choppily as she entered the room. Her voice had trailed off and she sweat dropped seeing the two teens in the bed. _"They told me his sister was here. Is that really his sister all over him like that?" _The nurse wondered as she tried to figure out what to do. _"My brother has been in the hospital many times because of his asthma and I've never once gotten into the bed with him. If these two are really brother and sister what kinky things are these kids into?"_

"Rise and shine!" The nurse shouted her eyes tightly closed and her face the slightest shade of red as she turned on the lights.

"Geez, you don't have to yell." Edward complained rubbing his eyes as he sat up.

"Time to get out of bed!" The nurse yelled again as she continued to keep her eyes tightly closed.

"Okay already, grief." Edward mumbled as he shook Alphonse to wake him up.

"Hey, get up before Nurse Bullhorn has a heart-attack." Alphonse just gave a small moan as he unconsciously wrapped his arms around Edward's waist snuggling up close to him. The morphine had apparently worn off. "What the #$ is wrong with you? Wake up and get the hell off me!" Edward screamed. Alphonse bolted up.

"Who? What? Where? Huh?" Alphonse uttered wildly looking around before feeling a sharp pain in his abdomen. Finally he realized someone was sitting next to him and looked over at Edward. "What are you doing in my bed, Brother?"

"Get out of the bed already!" The nurse roared becoming angry. "This isn't a love hotel!"

Hopping out of the bed Edward was in the woman's face in no time flat. "What the #$ do you think was going on here? Don't push your sick fantasies off on us!" Edward raged.

"You were the ones in the bed together!" The nurse shot back just as nasty.

Edward was starting to hyperventilate. "YOU BI-" Before Edward could get the last word completely out of his mouth Alphonse had ran up behind him slapping his left hand over his sibling's mouth and was holding him back with his right arm.

"I'm sorry Miss, but you're terribly mistake about us. This is my relative and she was just very concerned about me." Alphonse said trying his hand at correcting the woman.

"I saw the chart you know. For someone so concerned about you she sure had no problem sending you here." The nurse said holding up a clip board. Edward continued to scream profanities even though his mouth was firmly covered and Alphonse sweat dropped as he tightened his hold on Edward who tried to lung at the nurse again, arms and legs flailing in the air like the tentacles of a crazed octopus.

"Our fighting does get out of hand sometimes, but it really was an accident." Alphonse insisted as he continued to seemingly effortlessly keep Edward at bay. The nurse observed this and sighed.

"I guess I was wrong. I do apologize." She said and Edward finally calmed down. He didn't want to attack her anymore, but he was still rather angry and one wrong word could trigger another temper tantrum, Alphonse knew this so he never once loosened his grip on him.

"As you can see I'm just fine so there really wasn't anything to worry about." Alphonse continued.

"Your chart says otherwise." The nurse sternly pointed out.

"Maybe so, but there is no reason for me to stay here," Alphonse said as he moved toward the door.

"You can't just walk out of here, you're severely injured!" The nurse said jumping in front of him stretching out her arms blocking his path.

"I'm leaving." Alphonse said his usually soft eyes settling heavily on the woman. "Miss, I don't want to get into a confrontation with you." He said still holding Edward who was ready to lung at the nurse again, his golden eyes piercing into her like daggers.

_"I could loose my job for this."_ The woman thought lowering her arms and stepping aside.

Once outside the hospital Alphonse released Edward and doubled over in pain. "Ah! Are you alright? Why didn't you just stay? What was all that shit about 'I'm just fine', just fine my ass! We're going back." Edward said grabbing hold of Alphonse's arm.

"Brother, it hurts still, but it's okay. I'll be fine." He said standing upright.

"If that's really what you want…" Edward said letting go of him then noticed that the couple that had passed them was staring at them. "What the are you looking at? Edward boomed.

"You are in public walking around in a bathrobe." Alphonse pointed out.

"Like what you have on is any better?" Edward snapped. Alphonse was wearing hospital issue pajamas and was bare foot. Edward gave a huge sigh. "Let's, go back to the hotel and get dressed." He said walking off.

"Yeah, you still have to report to Mustang don't you?" Alphonse reminded.

"Oh $#&! I nearly forgot!" Edward said then ran off out of sight.

Alphonse sighed and continued to slowly trudge along. Seconds later there was a gust of wind which caused some of the debris on the street to fly up and Edward was standing in front of Alphonse with a worried expression on his face. In his haste to get to Mustang's office early he almost let it slip his mind that his brother wasn't exactly in the best condition. Lifting Alphonse's right arm he put it around his shoulders.

"You'll be late if you help me along like this." Alphonse said as they slowly moved along.

"I was just about to tell you to stop moving." Edward said giving his brother a strange look. "I'm not about to be late, that's why I'm carrying you on my back." Edward said moving so that Alphonse was behind him. Edward quickly pulled his brother up onto his back and took off running.

_"This is so embarrassing." _Alphonse thought as tears streamed down his face through his closed eyes.

To Be Continued

A/N: More answers to your questions. Am being rather brief here so feel free to e-mail me if you want my special gift of gab answers LOL. If you do just make sure to use the story title as the subject so I don't mistake you for a spammer.

**AnimeFreak92** wants to know;

"I went to your website and it said you have chapters 9-12 also, if so, why haven't you updated it yet? Or is that just how many chapthers this story is going to have in it?"

**Answer:** (edited from email) Dead links to chapters mean they aren't done yet and are the estimated number of just how many I'm more than likely going to have done before a writer's block attack. (sweat drop)

**Fayte** **Angel** wants to know; "u said something earlier about Al being the main character in your stories right? Get Ed with Roy and Roy introduce an OC to Al! can ya do that?"

**Answer:** Al is often overlooked, so I'm making the effort to give him just as much play if not more. Can't promise the requested pairings, but something along the lines of romance is sure to pop up sooner or later. ;)

**Meirelle** wants to know; "Why do people think this is perverted?"

**Answer:** Maybe the way I'm writing this makes things come off ever so slightly ambiguous giving room for people's minds to wonder? Maybe it was something I said? LOL (sweat drop).

**We Want Roy Damnit!**

I seriously thought Roy was going to make his début in this fiction for sure this chapter, but by the time I got to the end… LOL I'm sure he'll turn up in the next chapter. LOL (nervous sweat drop)


	10. Chapter 10

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Ten

Edward stood at the front desk seething. Roy was apparently out ill. Sheska looked at him with a worried expression on her face it seemed as if he would attack her at any moment.

"I can take your name and leave a message for him if you would like?" Sheska asked shakily, she may have been in the military, but she was completely useless in a fight. There was no way she would be able to defend herself if Edward attacked her.

"Fine!" Edward huffed.

"You're name?" Sheska requested, pen in hand.

"My name?" Edward repeated turning red.

"Yes." Sheska confirmed sweating, still feeling the intensity of the violent aura Edward was giving off.

"You know…" Edward begin nervously laughing as he too started sweating bullets. "It's okay, never mind." He said then darted out of the building.

Sheska let out a sigh of relief. _"I really thought she was going to attack me. Thank God." _Sheska sighed laying her face down on the desk. _"But she looked so familiar to me…," _she thought remembering every detail of female Edward's face and then remembering the boy she met a little over a year ago. _"Could they be related?"_

Edward returned to the hotel room to find it empty. "Al?" He called looking around even though he knew the boy was gone." Groaning Edward scratched his head. _"Where could he have gone off to in his condition?"_ He wondered then left the room to go find him.

Alphonse sat in on a bench against the wall of any abandoned building calmly feeding popcorn seeds to birds until a small wolfish looking dog dashed out of the alley on his left side scaring them away. The dog was black all over except for his paws, face and stomach which were a pale gray. He barked happily at Alphonse who straight away kneeled in front of him and looked at the name tag on his collar: Black Hayate.

"I thought you looked familiar." Alphonse said scooping the dog up into his arms letting the bright red leash dangle over the pavement. The dog barked again then licked his face causing the boy to giggle.

"Black Hayate, stop that," came the commanding voice of a woman. The dog turned in Alphonse's arms and sweetly barked at the woman wagging his tail. "You know cute doesn't work on me. I'll have to punish you later for bothering this young man." Hawkeye said reaching out for her companion. I'm sorry he bothered you." She said stiffly.

"He wasn't a bother." Alphonse replied worried exactly what the blond haired woman meant when she said she'd punish the dog.

"Bad dog, don't ever run off like that again." Hawkeye scolded as she held the dog up in front of her. The dog whined then barked happily still wagging his tail. "You're hopeless." She said placing the dog on the ground then sternly commanded it to sit. Hawkeye then looked up at Alphonse uncomfortable with the way he was staring at her. "Do I know you?" She asked her brown eyes settling heavily onto him.

Alphonse didn't want to answer her question, but he didn't want to lie to her either. "Well, um-"

"Stay still." Hawkeye commanded and Alphonse stood straight as a board as small drops of sweat formed at his temples. "You look familiar." She said in a gentle voice. She leaned uncomfortably close taking in his features and was sharply reminded of Edward. Her eyes widened and she stood back. "Al?" She questioned quietly and he nodded in response. Slowly her lips formed a small smile. "So you were successful, I'm glad."

"It's good to see you Lt. Hawkeye." Alphonse said taking a breath as a small wave of relief came over him.

"Colonel," Hawkeye said shortly.

"Hm?" Alphonse said looking up at her.

"It's Colonel Hawkeye now."

"Sorry, ma'am." Alphonse corrected himself.

"It's okay. You aren't military so you can call me by my first name if you want." Alphonse suddenly stiffened at her words. "What's wrong?" The first lieutenant turned colonel asked noticing his reaction, but before he could answer Hayate had jumped up on Alphonse's thigh biting at the shiny thing that hung ever so slightly from under his shirt. The dog had successfully taken the gold pocket watch, but before he could enjoy his prize hearing the cock of Hawkeye's gun the dog immediately dropped it on the ground. The pup knew that when the gun came out it meant 'stop what you're doing and don't ever do it again'.

"So, Colonel it is." Hawkeye said looking down at the watch as she put away her gun.

Edward had been out looking for his brother all morning and was becoming frustrated. "Where could he have run off to," was the question that frequently repeated itself in his mind. He had come back to check their room several times, but still the boy was nowhere to be found. It was noon now and Edward was hungry. He couldn't very well continue his search on an empty stomach and decided to get something to eat from the small dinner he was coming upon. The restaurant had an outside bar and Edward decided to take a seat there.

"What'll it be?" A young woman maybe in her twenties asked.

"Whatever the special is," Edward said not caring to look at a menu.

"Would you like milk with that?" The woman asked then stepped back when she saw the enraged expression on Edward's face. "Water it is." She said then scurried off.

Edward sat waiting on his meal completely unaware that he was being watched.

Across the street Roy Mustang stood wiping the sweat from his forehead with a white handkerchief then neatly placed it back into the pocket of his uniform. He may have been more than a little late coming into work, but there was no way, as much as would have liked to, stay home and let even more paper work pile up on his desk. It was just a little flu after all and right then he was only having a slight fever, nothing to worry about. That was what he had been mentally chanting to himself as he suavely, but dizzily made his way down the street. He dared not risk driving as his vision tended to unexpectedly blur, but at that moment it was just fine as he set eyes on a rather attractive girl.

_"Nice body, but she's kind of on the short side, she could be under age."_ Mustang thought letting his eyes settle on her chest. _"But, with a body like that there is no way she could be a minor; she has to be fully grown."_ Mustang reasoned as he approached his target. He may have been sick as a dog, but unless you were his doctor (or paying close attention) it was in no way evident from his appearance or his behavior as he smoothly made his way over to the girl.

"Hello" Mustang greeted as coolly as he could muster. His only response was a slight groan, but that didn't detour him; he was going to get a date this weekend (because by then he was sure he'd be healed) and so what if he had to work a little for it? "I noticed you were sitting here alone and thought I'd join you." Mustang said taking a seat on the stole next to hers.

"Suit yourself," was the muffled response. The girl was sitting with her face resting on her hands.

_"She seems upset. Maybe her boyfriend dumped her? Lucky me! Rebound dates are the best, but what idiot would dump such a cutie? Oh well who cares! She's mine now!" _Mustang thought happily.

"So-" Mustang started testing the waters to see what his next move would be, but was cut off.

"Cut the small talk and get to it already." The girl said demandingly not bothering to look at him.

_"Oh, a woman who doesn't mess around, I like her, but I am a bit caught off guard by her directness." _Mustang thought slightly blushing. "Well I was thinking-"

"Roy!" Riza Hawkeye's voice cut through the air like a knife and the man nearly fell out of his seat when he heard it. "Ed?" The voice came again except softer and apparently shocked.

"Yeah…" Edward said looking up for the first time his face a pale red. He was hoping they wouldn't recognize him in the body he was in, but he figured he should have known better, it wasn't like his appearance had changed all that much. Perhaps people he wasn't around so often would not recognize him, but he knew when he saw Mustang approaching that the jig was up. Usually sharp to the hidden connotations in people's words Edward had mistook the Brigadier General's flirting for picking since that was what he expected him to do once he found out what happened to him.

Mustang felt as if he had been struck through the head with a javelin. There was no way this was Fullmetal, the pipsqueak alchemist he had practically made his pet project. Not knowing what to do, since it was physically impossible to kick himself, the general burst into a fit of nervous laughter.

"STOP MAKING FUN OF ME DAMNIT!" Edward screamed drawing the attention of everyone within earshot.

"Yes, yes this is very serious indeed." Mustang said continuing to laugh. Mustang could have died right there of embarrassment and almost hoped Hawkeye would pull out her gun and shoot him on the spot.

"General please, you're making a spectacle of yourself." Hawkeye said stating the obvious as everyone continued to stare.

Edward sat mumbling profanities through a mouth full of food as he ate.

"What was that Edward, or is it something more feminine now?" Mustang questioned through giggles.

"Asshole!" Edward said after swallowing his last mouth full. Slamming payment for the meal down on the counter he then pulled a folder from under his shirt and slammed it on the counter as well. "Here's your report Brigadier General Shit." He said then proceeded to stomp away.

"Where do you think you're going and how dare you address you Fuhrer that way." Mustang said to Edward fully over his laughing fit.

"What the #$," Edward screamed abruptly turning around to face him. Edward could have died on the spot; that was not a funny joke.

"Acting Fuhrer," Hawkeye corrected in a low voice so not to draw anymore attention. Since miraculously defeating King Bradley and exposing his plans to turn Ametris into a massive grave for the creation of a Philosopher's Stone Mustang had been appointed to hold the position of Fuhrer until an official election was held, since as it would turn out nearly all of the higher ranking officials had to be removed for their involvement in the scandal.

_"This can't be happening. I'm getting dizzy." _Edward thought as everything around him began to swirl.

"Brother!" Alphonse exclaimed catching him before he hit the ground.

Mustang chuckled to himself. _"It's only a matter of time." _He thought smugly. "No doubt Ms. Elric failed to include how she ended up in her present condition in the report she gave me so make sure to tell your sister I expect to see her in my office as soon as she comes too." Mustang said as he carefully stood up. He too was feeling light headed. "By the way, it's good to finally meet you face to face." Mustang said to Alphonse giving a slight smile before moving on.

"Sir, you are in no condition to work today." Hawkeye said sternly.

"Then you're in charge of taking me home if I become too ill." Mustang said as he walked past her. Hawkeye sighed and followed him making sure to keep her distance as she wasn't in a hurry to fall ill as well. Unfortunately it was only a short while later that Hawkeye found herself caring him out to a military car and driving him home since he had passed out from exhaustion upon entering his office. The paperwork and his meeting with the Fullmetal Alchemist would unfortunately have to wait.

Another bright and sunny day before the doom that was winter was to fall upon them, but he couldn't enjoy it. There was too much work to be done and he was the only one that could do it. Mustang sat at his desk mechanically signing papers not really looking at them. Someone could have slipped an approval slip in right under his nose for a base party and he would have signed it. If Havoc was there just such a thing might have happened. Mustang sighed looking up from all the paperwork in front of him glancing at the door expecting Hughes to come strolling in, a pocket sized picture book in hand. How long had it been since his closest friend had been gone, murdered, taken away from him and the family he cherished so much? Perhaps he would never recover from the wound his friend's murder left on his heart. Closing his eyes Mustang inhaled deeply and returned to his work just slightly more attentive to what he was doing when his office door opened letting in a breeze that blew some papers up into his face.

Why couldn't people knock before entering his office? Was he the only Brigadier General that commanded such low respect? Didn't these people know he was the Flame Alchemist and even without his state title wouldn't it stand to reason that one would think twice before barging into the room of a pyro who could burn a city to a crisp with the snap of his fingers?

"What do you want?" Mustang demanded agitatedly as he removed the document that had flown up and stuck to his face. The general's eyes nearly fell out when he saw who had disturbed him. _"Damnit, what was her name again?"_ Mustang thought as the girl closed the door and approached his desk. "EDWARD!" Mustang shouted standing up and slamming the palms of his hands down on the oak desk. "What are you doing just barging in here like this?" He demanded.

"I barge where ever I want and second of all you're the one who ordered me to come here right away."

_"Yeah, that's right I did." _Mustang thought sweat dropping. "You're over an hour late and as I recall I told you to be waiting here when I arrived at headquarters, so now my question for you, Ms. Elric, is where have you been all this time?" Mustang narrowed his eyes as he continued to pretend to be angrier than he actually was. Though the man actually was angry it was only a byproduct emotion due to the nervousness that Edward's presence was making him feel.

"I was getting my uniform altered." Edward said knocking the piles of papers from Mustang's desk in one swipe then hoping on top laying across it in a pose. "Don't you like it?"

Mustang doubled back in shock. Edward was wearing his ideal women's military uniform. Instead of the standard pants that all military personal wore (accept for a certain State Alchemist who was too small to fit the stand uniforms and just wore regular clothes) Edward was wearing a very tiny miniskirt. "What is the meaning of this? Get out of my office!" Mustang ordered.

"Are you serious? I saw the way you were looking at me yesterday and what about how you were so shamelessly flirting with me?" Edward smirked.

Mustang breathed a sigh of relief and gave a small chuckle. "Very funny Fullmetal, you nearly gave me a heart attack. If you don't want to tell me how you ended up like that fine. Now get off of my office and go change out of that outfit before you embarrass yourself."

"A woman is only embarrassed to wear this kind of outfit if she's unsure of herself." Edward said sitting up and crossing her legs as she unbraided her hair.

"What are you saying?" Mustang asked his heart racing as another wave of shock hit him like a ton of bricks.

"Isn't it obvious?" Edward said shaking her hair loose. "All this time and you couldn't tell?"

"Tell what?" Mustang questioned keeping his distance.

"Why do you think I was so determined to perform another human transmutation? It wasn't just my brother who lost his original body."

"Are you saying you were born a woman?" Mustang asked unable to wrap his mind around the information presented to him.

"Bingo genius."

"But, that can't be."

"You may have found a boy with a broken body that day all those years ago, but think about it; have you ever encountered a man as moody as I was? Besides what I've been through as a child what else could have caused a guy to have such a serious chip on his shoulder?"

"So, you were never actually…" Mustang started and brought his hand to his mouth realizing it was hanging open in utter disbelief.

"Don't' tell me you're all of a sudden disgusted by me." Edward smirked.

"You poor thing," Mustang said lowering his hand and looking away from her.

"I'm not hurting over it." Edward sighed bored with the general's pity. Hopping off the desk she walked over to him and grabbed his right hand.

Mustang's body tensed. "What are you doing?"

"You're an adult figure it out." Edward said slyly.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The man screamed not fully awake from the fever induced dream.

Hawkeye sat worriedly on the edge of Mustang's bed. After bringing him to his house she couldn't allow herself to just leave him there to sleep it off and found herself tending to him as a nurse would. Instead of dumping him on the sofa with a blanket she carried him up two flights of stairs to his bedroom and removed his uniform jacket and shoes and carefully tucked him into bed, maybe a little too well. The man lay practically smothered underneath three heavy blankets, one quilt, and two comforters. Hawkeye had placed a cool towel on his head to help with the fever and left the room to prepare some soup. When she returned to the room to check on him Mustang was twitching under the covers apparently having a night-terror of some sort except it was the middle of the day.

"No! No! Get away!" Mustang continued screaming raked on the colonel's nerves. After three failed attempt at waking the man from his disturbed slumber Hawkeye sighed pulling out her handgun firing it into the ceiling. "AH!" Mustang exclaimed finally fully awake. He looked over at the woman wanting to yell at her for shooting up his house, but decided it would be a bad idea and ignored the chips of paint and plaster dust that had fallen down into his bed. Mustang was going to lay back down when he noticed something off about Hawkeye's attire. "Are you wearing my clothes?" He asked without thinking. Hawkeye had changed out of her uniform and into one of Mustang's more casual outfits.

The woman blinked and stared at him for a minute before answering making the already uncomfortable situation even tenser. "I'm not getting paid for this." Hawkeye replied curtly then flew out of the room like a gust of wind before Mustang could blink.

Utterly confused Mustang laid back down keeping his eyes open, afraid to go to go back to sleep. _"A book, I need to read a book and stay awake." _Mustang thought reaching for the unread novel on his nightstand. Sliding over closer to the edge of the bed reaching out for the waiting book he slipped from between the mattress and the covers and fell onto the floor. "Damit." Mustang cursed quietly. Too dizzy and exhausted to stand up and put himself back into bed the man remained on the floor, freezing, until Hawkeye returned a little over an hour later wearing her own clothes, carrying a bowl of soup on a tray with a piece of bread a glass of orange juice.

"Thank you." Mustang said wearily as the woman helped him back into the bed then handed him the tray of food.

"I'm not giving them back." Hawkeye sternly informed her brown eyes settling heavily onto him. In her opinion the outfit she had taken didn't suit him at all and made him look more feminine than handsome. Besides all that it just looked better on her anyway, so there was no reason a man should have owned such an outfit in the first place. Mustang started sweating under the woman's gaze. Hawkeye could be awfully scary sometimes.

"Is there anything else you would like?" He inquired sarcastically, so not to appear as afraid as he actually was. He may have been the Flame Alchemist, but Hawkeye was the best there was when it came to fire arms, she'd have Swiss cheesed his body with bullets before he could get even one finger into his trusty ignition gloves.

Mustang's heart nearly jumped completely up his throat when Hawkeye abruptly stood up. Reaching down she took the empty food tray from his hands and left the room. Mustang could hear her footsteps landing heavily on each step as she went down stairs to the kitchen. Moments later she returned breathing heavily.

"There is something else." She said looking down at him.

"Huh?" Mustang said having almost fell asleep in the short time it took for her to leave the room and return.

Hawkeye reached down and ripped the covers from his body. Mustang curled up into a ball feeling the chilled air (well, the air is chilled to him because he's sick). "What are you doing?" Mustang demanded then suddenly became concerned Hawkeye would shoot him.

"Are you going to make me ask twice even though you offered it freely?"

The man's face turned beat red and a sudden silence dropped in the room. "Well aren't you forward." Mustang managed to say. "Are you in a hurry to get sick or something?" He asked sweating partly from the fever and partly from fear. It wasn't like he didn't find her attractive, but this was insane.

"I'll just clean it before I use it." Hawkeye said obviously becoming impatient.

"If you insist," Mustang sighed as he undid the belt that held his pants in place and pulled it from around his waist. As soon as the belt was off Hawkeye snatched it away.

The workmanship on the buckle was exquisite and the leather was so soft. Hawkeye had tried to find one just like at all the stores in Central and various other places, but was unable to find anything that even resembled it. "Such detail," she said admiring the belt with a fond look in her eyes and a small smile on her lips which quickly turned to a frown when she looked up. "What are doing?" She asked commandingly.

Mustang sweat dropped. He sat on the bed with his pants down around his ankles. _"All she wanted was the belt?" _He thought as his heart began to race. What would be a believable excuse for his sudden stripping in front of her? "I'm sick and I'm trying to get comfortable." He said a matter-of-factly.

"Well, since I have what I want I'll leave now, so you can get as comfortable as you want." Hawkeye informed then left the house.

"You moron," Mustang scolded himself out loud then finished pulling his pants off before getting back under the covers.

To Be Continued

**Author's Note**: More questions? In that case better get to answering them.

**Ellen Tee** wants to know; "Are you going to make him a guy again?"

**Answer**; Keep reading and find out

**Sango-maru** wants to know; "if there is roy/edo, when/if edo gets his body back will it still be roy/edo? why not just stick al with winry? . . . wouldn't it be easier than an OC?"

**Answer**; You really want to see some pairing don't you? I already have things set as far as what will happen in future chapters, just have to flesh them out and post them on my website so, I hope you in enjoy reading them. Specifically to the Roy x Ed pairing request, you can get a good idea from my other fics if that'll be on the menu or not. (o)

I am at a bit of a loss for what to say except thanks for reading and letting me know you enjoyed this fan fiction!

Oh! About Roy's taste in fashion... I saw a picture of him with a scarf on, which can be found on official Japanese Fullmetal Alchemist website, and thought "yuck!" In my opinion it just didn't look right and overall I found the outfit mismatching and hideous, so of course that isn't the one Riza had taken in this story, not even the belt. (Seeing how ugly it is why would she? Even so I must say he was still looking rather hot. o)


	11. Chapter 11

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Eleven

Sheska nearly dropped the stack of files she was carrying when she saw the golden haired young alchemist walk through the door. _"Oh no, not the crazy girl again," _She thought as she hurriedly put the files in their proper places.

"Excuse me." Edward said once he reached the desk.

"Yes?" Sheska responded dropping the last file onto the floor. It was a rather thick folder of loose pages and they made a nice mess on the floor when she dropped them. "Ah, one moment," Sheska said kneeling down to pick up the loose pages. It took maybe about thirty seconds for her to reorganize the pages in the folder, a task that would have taken someone else much, much longer to complete. Due to her amazing photographic memory Sheska was able to get things done in less than half the time it took most people, but for that reason she often found herself over worked.

"May I help you?" Sheska smiled nervously. _"Please, don't say you're here for Brigadier General Mustang again."_

"I'm here to see Mustang." Edward said flatly. He didn't want to see the general at all, but knew he'd be in deep trouble if he didn't report to him as ordered.

_"Doh!" _Sheska thought believing she had somehow jinxed herself. "I'm sorry, but he's not in today either I'm afraid." The woman said apologetically.

"Again?" Edward shrieked. He had waken up extra early that morning, a very difficult feat pull off since he had spent all night perfecting his fabrication of how he ended up as a she.

"I'm very sorry." Sheska said sweating. Edward looked as if he would explode; his face seemed to have swollen five times its original size and was bright red. Letting out maybe the hugest sigh Sheska had ever seen Edward's face went back to its original size and color in no time flat. "Whatever, you can just tell Brigadier General Shit I said he could bite me." Edward said nonchalantly as he turned on his heal and started to walk off.

"And who are you again." Sheska asked without thinking and sweat dropped when Edward turned back around, his expression mirroring her own. Pulling a pen and notepad seemingly out of thin air Edward scribbled something on a sheet of paper, ripped it from the pad, folded it in half then handed it to the woman. "Don't look at it." Edward instructed then left.

Sheska took the note and sat it in a small desktop basket full of messages for Mustang. It only took fifteen minutes for her curiosity to get the better of her. Telling Sheska not to read something was just like all the files labeled 'classified', it only made her want to read it even more. After reading the note Sheska's face turned white from shock and disbelief. _"That was Edward Elric?" _She thought remembering the boy who had helped her out a little over a year ago. Everything in her wanted to deny that the busty girl she had just seen that day and the day before was the Fullmetal Alchemist, but she remembered his hand writing as clear as her own name, that girl was indeed Edward Elric. _"People have always said something was strange about him. They've even said he wasn't human. I don't believe the not being human part, but strange…. No, more like down right weird. Is he a woman or a man? And if he can change genders like that then does that make the not being human thing true?" _There were many rumors about the Fullmetal Alchemist most of which were nowhere near the truth. Among the military in the area it was believed that Edward Elric was some kind of genetically engineered experiment of the military and that the suit of armor Alphonse was actually a robot. Sheska usually paid the outlandish rumors no mind, but now she didn't know what to believe.

Alphonse was supposed to be waiting for his brother outside on the stairs, but shortly after Edward entered the building a cat wondering the street had caught his eye. _"Poor thing it must be hungry and lonely." _Alphonse thought getting up from his spot and following the cat into an alley.

"Here kitty." Alphonse called sweetly. "I won't hurt you. Here kitty." Alphonse called again to the reluctant pussy cat from a kneeling position on the ground. The cat remained still and seeing this Alphonse came closer to the stray. Reaching out to pick it up the cat scratched at his hand drawing blood. Alphonse snatched his hand back in pain. The cat then hissed at him and ran away.

"Al, there you are!" Edward called as he entered the alley. Alphonse didn't respond. "What are you up to?" Edward asked coming closer expecting to catch his brother picking up yet another stray animal. Alphonse had a bad habit of picking up various animals and feeding them, most of which were feline. Sometimes though Alphonse would pick up the occasional human being and while his need to rescue seemingly every stray animal he came across did irritate Edward to no end he found Alphonse's tendency to scoop up humans as well just plain freaky. "Hey, Al." Edward said putting a hand on his brother's shoulder put drew it back when Alphonse turned around foaming at the mouth.

Edward's eyes grew three times their size and he took off running as Alphonse had immediately started attacking him. Edward ran out of the alley at top speed Alphonse close behind. He didn't get far at all before Alphonse pounced on his back biting him so hard in the shoulder it drew blood. Edward could hear himself screaming in agony just before passing out as his brother's teeth cut into his flesh, ripping and tearing as they clamped down. It wasn't long before police officers were on the scene. Sadly they had to stun gun Alphonse before they could remove him from Edward's body without running the risk of being bitten themselves.

A few hours later the siblings woke up in the same room in the city's hospital. Edward turned his head to see Alphonse bond to his bed by various straps across his body.

"Brother, I can't move." Alphonse said sounding like a small child.

"I'll free you!" Edward said getting up but fell back onto the bed suddenly feeling lighted headed. After regaining his bearings Edward looked over at his brother angrily. "Hey! Why did you bite me anyway?"

"I didn't bite you." Alphonse denied not remembering what happened just a little under an hour before.

"Yes you did. How do think this bloody bandage got on my arm." Edward said angling his face down at his left shoulder.

"Sorry." Alphonse said smirking.

"What's so funny?" Edward demanded. "You bit me so hard I thought I was going to be eaten alive!"

"Sorry, Brother. It's not like you didn't have it coming." Alphonse said on the verge of laughter.

"Had it coming? Why you little…" Edward said moving as to leap on his younger sibling but the pain in bleeding arm stilled any further aggression.

"I'm sorry, it's just hard to believe, that's all." Alphonse replied still smiling.

"Well believe it. I'm almost certain you took a chunk out of me."

"Hello." A nurse said entering the room. Straight away the woman went to widening the blinds to let in more sunlight. "Is it safe to untie you?" She asked coming to stand beside Alphonse's bed.

"Yes, please." Alphonse said looking up at her pleadingly and she removed the restraints.

"You were out cold on the transport here, but when you arrived you had come to and it took ten men just to hold you down." The nurse informed him as he sat up, leaving out the part that consisted of a good deal of fighting which resulted in black eyes, missing teeth, concussions and all ten of the male nurses needing to get rabies shots as well just in case. The first floor lobby of the hospital looked more like a war zone than a reception area; lucky for them Alphonse was too far gone to use alchemy. "What I'm curious to know is how you two ended up with rabies in the first place." The nurse said looking at Edward then to Alphonse.

"Yeah, how did you end up giving me rabies?" Edward questioned his gaze heavily settling onto his brother.

"I guess it was the cat that scratched me in the alley."

"Cat?" Edward yelled. "How many times have I told you to stop picking up stray animals?"

"I know I'm sorry, Brother." Alphonse said causing the nurse who was sitting on the bed beside Edward to double check his chart.

_"Brother? It says here this one is female. What's wrong with that boy?" _The nurse thought giving Alphonse a split second quizzical look.

"Awe, forget about it." Edward sighed. His shoulder really was hurting badly and the bandage on it was already drenched in blood.

"Ooh, I better get you a new bandage." The nurse said looking at Edward's arm. Then without warning Alphonse suddenly vomited and on the floor mixed with blood, stomach acid and other bodily fluids lay a half digested chunk of skin. "Oh dear." The nurse said unexcitedly though her expression said differently, her eyes had bulged making her pupils appear to be tiny dots in a sea of white. "So, I guess that explains where the missing skin from your arm went." She said after her features returned to normal.

"What?" Edward exclaimed becoming dizzy. Of course it hurt like hell when Alphonse bit into him, but had his brother really tried to eat him alive like he said?"

_"I'm a monster."_ Alphonse thought tears streaming from his eyes which quickly turned into gushing waterfalls as he openly whaled like at the site of what had just come out of him on the floor.

The nurse sweat dropped as her heart started to race, she had no idea how to handle such a situation. "I'll go find something to clean this up." She said rushing out of the room. The nurse's colleagues eyed her suspiciously as she exited the room since Alphonse's wailing was very loud and could be heard a good distance down the hall.

Edward sat holding his wounded arm as he watched Alphonse; he still couldn't believe what had happened despite the blood, the pain, and the mess on the floor. "Al…" Edward said getting off of his bed and taking a clumsy step forward nearly walking right into the festering mess on the floor, letting out a small sound of disgust he avoided it and came to sit beside his brother.

"Al." Edward called again, but Alphonse was far too distressed and couldn't hear his gentle calling over the sound of his own voice crying out. Reaching out Edward wrapped his arms around Alphonse pulling him over close to his body resting his head on his uninjured shoulder. Alphonse squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head upon getting an up close look at the bloody bandages around Edward's arm.

"I'm sorry!" Alphonse's voice was muffled and quivering uncontrollably.

"It's okay." Edward said patting his head. Alphonse was saying something, but the words only came out as unintelligible groans through the sobbing. "It'll heal. I'll be fine."

"Okay, I'm back said the nurse as she entered the room with cleaning supplies and wearing a thick pair of latex gloves. Kneeling down she picked up the skin with a pair of tweesers. "Interesting." She said taking a moment to examine it. Edward sweat dropped as he watched her place it in a preserve jar.

"Um, what are you planning on doing with that?" Edward asked as he continued to hold Alphonse who had calmed down considerably but was still shaking in his arms.

"I'm going to study it. I've never seen such a thing."

"It's just skin." Edward said sweat dropping.

"Yes, but I've never seen human flesh that has been eaten." The nurse said sending Alphonse into another fit of tears. Edward put his brother's face to his chest to muffle the awful noise he was keeping up.

The nurse quickly went about cleaning up the floor and making sure the room was sterol once again. Alphonse's crying made her extremely uncomfortable. The nurse wasn't particularly good with people and she definitely didn't know how to handle a hysterically sobbing teenager. "I'll send another nurse in to change your bandages." She said appearing to be the picture of calm then ran like lightening out of the door.

Edward put Alphonse, who once again calmed down though still crying, at arms length holding his shoulders. "Al, you've got to pull yourself together." Alphonse gave no response and his eyes remained downcast. "Snap out of it already!" Edward said shaking him only achieving another eruption.

"I'm a horrible person!" Alphonse whaled.

"Please stop!" Edward pleaded. While it did hurt to see Alphonse in such a condition that feeling was running neck and neck with the irritation he felt as his siblings high pitched wailing grated on his nerves. Edward pulled Alphonse's head back down somewhat muting the noise again. Resting his head on his brother's shoulder he sighed. _"What's going on with you?" _Edward thought unable to understand his brother's strange behavior at all. It couldn't have been the rabies because they had both been treated for that, so it must have been something else, but what? Granted vomiting up a chunk of your sibling's skin was no small thing, but Alphonse was inconsolable. It was very disturbing for Edward to see his brother distressed in anyway because that usually meant something had really gotten to him. _"What are you doing? You are supposed to be the level headed one. It'd be different if it was me acting like this because I'm moody as hell but you're always there to calm me down. Alphonse if you break what am I going to do?"_

When the other nurse finally came to change Edward's bloody bandages Alphonse had cried himself to sleep in Edward's arms. Not wanting to risk waking him up Edward didn't move a muscle except for the arm the nurse needed to place the bandages on.

Some time later Alphonse woke up feeling a bit better, but still unable to shake the memory of how his brother's blood tasted in his mouth, nor the feeling of his flesh in his throat has he swallowed it. Those memories had come flooding back to him just before he got sick. He could remember everything and it greatly disturbed him. While the disease had polluted his brain making him unreasonably angry and violent he could remember feeling a rush of excitement the whole time; the more violent he was the more he enjoyed it. Remembering the sick thrill he got from tearing into Edward's skin like a piece of well done steak made him ill and if there had been anything left in his stomach he surely would have vomited it out.

Opening his eyes he sweat dropped as he realized what he was laying on. _"This is weird." _Alphonse thought. _"For so long I've wanted to touch him and now that I can it seems like I'm touching some stranger that isn't him. Maybe it's because this really isn't his body. Still, that shouldn't matter. He never treated me any differently while I was in the armor, so why can't I do the same for him? Ever since I've realized what's happened I've been treating him like my sister. It's so confusing. Am I doing what's right by acknowledging Edward is female now or am I giving up and betraying his hopes of being restored to his real body? And after what I did to him today I don't think I can ever forgive myself for that, even now I feel nervous being this close to him. I'm afraid I'm going to hurt him again." _Alphonse thought feeling his eyes burn with tears. _"I love you, Brother." _

"Al, you okay?" Edward asked noticing he was awake.

"Hm-hmm." Came the untruthful response.

"Okay, then could you get off of me? You're cutting off my circulation."

"Sorry." Alphonse said getting up and quickly wiping the tears from his face.

Edward dangled his legs over the side of the bed feeling them tingle as the blood flooded through them. Not only had his legs fallen asleep, but his neck and back hurt. "Why don't you stay here and finish healing up?" Edward asked as he stood up bending and stretching as he tried to work out the knot in his back.

"I'm fine." Alphonse answered in his usual cheerful tone.

"Don't give me that. You were already injured and then that damn cat and the rabies… Al, you're in pretty bad shape. You need to take time out to heal."

"Like when we were in Farmland for nearly a month?"

"That was because my lazy ass passed out in the woods." Edward said becoming irritated. "And don't even think about trying to reason away what I did to you."

_"It's not like you enjoyed it." _Alphonse thought too ashamed to say so out loud. "Me staying here is only going to slow down our research."

"You waited five years on our research, brother. We both have the same blood in our veins so I'm sure I can tough it out just as well as you did." Edward said with far more confidence than he actually had. "Except for this scrape I'm fine, so I'm going down to the library here to see what I can find and I'll be back later on tonight." Edward said changing out of the hospital clothes into what he had on before until he picked up the torn, blood stained shirt and sweat dropped. "Since you're not going anywhere I'm going to barrow your shirt." Edward said taking Alphonse's clothes and putting them on before rushing out the door.

Alphonse fell over on the bed with a heavy sigh. _"He calls it a scrape. He says he can tough it out, but we both know how difficult it is for you to wake up each day in that body. I don't want to upset him, so I'll stay here until I'm well if that's what he really wants."_

A week later Edward and Alphonse were still in East City partly because Edward didn't want to do any heavy traveling while Alphonse was still not completely healed and partly because he still had to meet with Mustang who didn't hesitate to call the hotel the siblings were staying in to threaten a court marshal if he left town before reporting to him. Not that Mustang was looking forward to seeing the Fullmetal Alchemist. The threat was only to save face so that he wouldn't appear to be irresponsible. If he felt he could have Mustang would have let Edward do whatever he wanted just to keep him as far away from him as possible.

It was afternoon and Alphonse was returning from the library to check on Edward who fainted earlier. As he walked a cat darted in front of him letting out a mean hiss before running off into an alley. Not giving his actions a second thought Alphonse chased after it. The cat stood on top of a dumpster hisses fiercely at its pursuer.

_"That's the same cat that scratched me that day." _Alphonse recalled as he stared at it. He wanted to pick it up and take it to a vet to be treated, but he couldn't do so without risking getting scratched again. _"It's horrible, but there really are times I miss my armor." _Alphonse thought as he cautiously approached the cat. Putting on his gloves he removed his coat and tossed it over the feline. Grabbing it up he hurriedly ran out of the alley and to a veterinarian.

The person that met him was a girl about seventeen, maybe eighteen. She had long light brown hair, big blue eyes, and wore bright pink lipstick which almost looked purple. The white apron she wore completely covered the black and purple striped mini dress she had on underneath. "May I help you?" She asked curiously eyeing the violently moving bundle of red cloth Alphonse carried in his left hand.

"My cat has rabies." He said holding up the coat turned cat-sack. The girl jumped away.

"I'm only an assistant. My mom's the one who runs the place." She said quickly bowing and excusing herself. A moment later a tall woman with short dark brown hair and glasses appeared.

"Hello, I'm doctor Eiselstein. I hear you have a rabid kitty." She said looking at the sack Alphonse was now holding with both hands in front of him.

"Yeah." He sighed handing the bundle over to the doctor. The woman reached out with hands covered in thick rubber gloves and took the diseased cat away from him. Working quickly Dr. Eiselstein removed the cat from the confines of Alphonse's coat and jabbed a needled into its behind. The animal immediately stopped moving and fell over.

"That was just a sedative." The doctor said seeing the worried expression on Alphonse's face. Taking out second needle she gave the cat another shot. "He should wake up in a few hours. Make sure to keep him warm until then." She said handing the limp animal back to him.

"Thank you." Alphonse said before paying her for her services and leaving.

Two and a half hours later the veterinarian's daughter found Alphonse sitting on the ground near the alley he had found the cat in. _"Here's my chance!" _She thought making her way over to him. "Hi." She said smiling a closed mouth smile at him.

"Hello." Alphonse said looking up briefly.

"Is he okay?" The girl asked carefully sitting on the ground next to him.

"He's been sleeping ever since your mom gave him the shots."

"Oh…" The girl said not knowing what else to say. "My name's Mary-Ann, Mary-Ann Eiselstein." She said beaming another closed mouth smile.

"My name's Alphonse." He said returning her smile. Stirring the cat woke up, jumping out of Aphonse's arms when it saw Mary-Ann then ran away straight through the alley to the next street. "Come back!" Alphonse weakly called getting up to chase it, but the animal was already gone. "Oooh." He sighed moving to walk away, but Mary-Ann was blocking his path.

"You're really cute." She said still smiling.

"Ah, you think so?" Alphonse asked a bit caught off guard by her comment.

"Hm-hmm." Mary-Ann nodded.

Edward had awaken in an awkward position even though his brother had taken care to lay him straight on his back. Walking down the street he stopped momentarily to stretch when he caught a glimpse of his brother across the way talking to some strange woman. Edward frowned and once traffic cleared he stomped across the street. "Let's go." Edward said grabbing Alphonse's arm in a motion to pull him away, but Mary-Ann had grabbed his other arm holding him in place.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" Mary-Ann demanded.

"Take a guess!" Edward said yanking Alphonse over.

"I saw him first!" Mary-Ann said giving Alphonse's arm a strong tug.

"Who do you think you are pulling on him like you own him? Let him go you bitch!" Edward yelled letting go of his brother's arm.

"Who are you calling a bitch you little slut!" Mary-Ann shot back her attention falling away from Alphonse as well.

"LITTLE? WHO ARE CALLING MICRO SIZED YOU BUTT UGLY PURPLE WHORE?"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING AN UGLY WHORE YOU TINY-WINEY LITTLE SKANK?"

A crowd had quickly formed around the two arguing girls and everyone was waiting to see who would throw the first punch. _"Uh-oh. Ed's going to be in big trouble if Mustang finds out he was throwing down in broad day light with a civilian." _Alphonse thought jumping between the two girls who were about to start fighting and knocked them down.

"Hey!" Mary-Ann shouted.

"What's the big idea Alphonse?" Edward angrily asked having landed hard on his behind.

"I'm sorry." Alphonse said apologizing to Mary-Am while wearing a sheepish grin, he really didn't intend on hitting either of them that hard. Picking up Edward he ran as far away from the crowd as he could get carrying him under his arm.

"Brother!" Alphonse yelled setting Edward on his feet after they were a good distance away. "How could you? I really liked her!" Alphonse said in a sad voice as tears hung from his eyes.

"You don't even know her!" Edward shouted back, his head becoming ten times the size of a beach ball. A strong wind blew from his mouth as he spoke nearly knocking Alphonse down. "Beside that I didn't like her." Edward said much calmer than he was only seconds before. "You have some taste in women." He said giving the thumbs down sign.

"I get the feeling you don't want me to have a girlfriend." Alphonse said with an angry edge to his words.

"No, it's not that. It's just that she wasn't good enough for you, that's all." Edward said putting his arms behind his head and walking away with a smile on his face. So what if Alphonse was mad at him, he had successfully foiled any potential romance that may have occurred and was hoping he'd be just as successful if the need to do so again arose. There was no way Alphonse was going to get married and leave him all alone. After all who the hell would want to marry a jerk like him? For this reason Edward had made it his mission to poke fun at his brother's romantic dreams and to drop kick every woman that even dared look his way. He knew what he was doing was selfish and wrong, but he hated being alone even more and so he'd do what he had to to keep that from happening.

To Be Continued

**Author's note**: no snazzy end comments this time around just questions.

**Chemical Love** wants to know; "Will Ed and Al's teacher make an appearance in this story too?" **Answe**r; Oh, you can bet on it! 


	12. Chapter 12

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter 12

It was a little after two o'clock in the afternoon when Alphonse decided to take a break from his research. It was the same as before, same research materials as before and not even the newer findings on medical alchemy provided him with any clue on how to help his brother. Closing his eyes for a moment as he walked down the street he couldn't help but feel a great deal of guilt. _"That array I destroyed in the catacombs. If only I had realized what happened to him sooner I could have reversed the change before I destroyed it."_ Alphonse thought as he recalled every detail of the transmutation circle Edward had used to restore him. They had both made detailed notes on it in their journals even though they could recall what it looked like without the notes as reminders, particularly Alphonse who could recall every line and symbol precisely. _"There was something strange about it the way it glowed. It would be easy enough to duplicate the array with enough space, but whatever power was fueling it is the key to making it work. We have to figure out what it is. Instead of just going over research on biological alchemy we should look for ways to boost alchemic reactions."_ Before finding out the true nature of the Philosipher's Stone the siblings were obsessed with finding it convinced its power was the only hope they had, therefore, abandoning research on any other alchemic boosters believing they would not be powerful enough.

Spirits slightly lifted Alphonse turned around to head back to the library, but was confronted by a tall muscular man in a black suit and sunglasses. Alphonse didn't know what was going on, but the situation felt too much like deja vu to him.

"Wait." The man said when Alphonse had started to walk away.

Pausing to look over his shoulder at the man the bad feeling he had only deepened.

"I just want to talk to you for a minute." The man in black said wearing a fake smile.

"My master told me never to talk to strangers." Alphonse said before running away and sure enough the man gave chase. Ducking into an alley Alphonse clapped his hands together quickly transmuted a cage around his pursuer as he soon as he entered the alley.

"You know alchemy? But how did you…? Oh, never mind. Just let me out of here kid so we can talk about this man to man."

"Why were you chasing me?" Alphonse demanded.

"Our boss wants to have a word with you, that's all."

"Who? Who wants to have a word with me?"

"Come with me and find out."

"I don't think so mister."

"Is that so? Well I don't think you have a choice in the matter." The man grinned and before Alphonse knew what was going on another man in black had snuck up behind him covering his nose and mouth with a white cloth, the chemical that it was laced with immediately causing him to lose consciousness.

"Three, you moron! You were in charge of investigating this runt. Why didn't you know he could use alchemy?" The second man in black asked his caged partner in crime.

"Come on give me a break. Out of all the kids we've rounded up for the boss how many of them were potentially dangerous?"

"Dangerous to a moron like you perhaps." The second man in black said scribbling a transmutation circle on a small piece of paper then placing it on the cement bars. There was a flash of light and the cage crumbled away freeing the man called Three. "Thanks." He said dusting himself off.

"Whatever, we almost lost this one because of your bumbling; now tie up is feet. I'll make sure his hands are bound properly so he can't use alchemy." The second man in black said as he placed another transmutation circle on a garbage can turning it into a chain that he then used to bind Alphonse's hands.

"He can do it without using those circles you're always drawing One." Three commented as he used the rope he was carrying to secure Alphonse's feet stopping momentarily to clap his hands together.

"Yeah, the kid must be some kind of prodigy to pull something like that off, but enough chit-chat, we need to get him in the car before anyone sees us." One said picking Alphonse up and taking him to the black limousine that was waiting by the curb.

"Damn it!" Edward exclaimed sitting up in bed fully clothed. The last thing he could remember was finishing lunch. He and Alphonse were going to return to the library right afterward, but after they left the restaurant there was nothing. _"This has been happening a lot lately."_ Edward thought removing a bottle of pills from a hidden compartment in his suit case. _"It figures these damn things wouldn't help any." _He thought as he went into the bathroom and flushed the remaining pills down the toilet. Brawly the old doctor in Farmland had prescribed the medication to him as a possible short term solution, but after nearly two months of secretly popping the pills during each meal Edward had it with the medicine. He hated taking any kind of drug for anything and the fact that the ones he had been forcing himself to take weren't working only irritated him even more. _"I'm sort of surprised Al hasn't said anything to me about it, maybe he already knows? I sure hope he doesn't. It's my problem and I don't even want to know."_ Edward thought as he braided his hair. He had just enough time to make it to Mustang's office to finally meet with him, hopefully.

Alphonse slowly opened his eyes as the chemical's effects wore off. He was tied to a wooden chair in a large room. The lights were out and heavy velvet indigo colored drapes covered the windows. Alphonse groaned as he tried to squeeze out of the ropes to no avail. Edward was always able to escape such predicaments. Alphonse believed his brother had only acquired such a skill for potential jail breaks and was at that moment wishing he had paid closer attention. The door on the far side of the room opened and four people walked in. Slowly a lone figure walked over to the drapes and pulled them open just enough for a small amount of light to enter the room making the four figures visible. The person who had opened the drapes was a beautiful tall woman with waist long wavy black hair and blue eyes. The other three figures where men dressed in black one of which Alphonse recognized. They all stood uniformly side by side blocking the door.

"How are you feeling?" The woman asked looking out of the window.

"I'm feeling okay." Alphonse replied. "Who are you people?"

"I thought you would have figured that out long before now, sweetie." The woman said turning her attention toward him.

"Well then if you all are nothing but a bunch of common criminals what do you want with me?"

The woman's eyes flickered with anger. "Common criminals? I assure you boy there is nothing common about my crime syndicate." The woman said walking over to him, the heels of her shoes heavily clicking against the marble flooring.

_"Oh, I get it now; they must be looking for recruits." _Alphonse thought struggling against the ropes. "I have no intentions of joining you." He said firmly.

The woman immediately began to laugh. "You silly little boy I would never dream of asking someone your age to join my gang. You'd have to be at least fifteen for that."

_"But I am fifteen! How old does she think I am?"_ Alphonse thought wanting to laugh, but kept a straight face. _"I don't think she knows anything about me so why go through all the trouble of bringing me here if she isn't looking for recruits?"_

"No, my dear. I had my men bring you here for another reason entirely." The woman said leaning over and tilting his face up toward her own. Alphonse sweat dropped. "One, Two, Three you are dismissed. Close the door on your way out and I want no interruptions. Do you understand? None whatsoever."

"Yes, Miss Natalie." The men said in unison before exiting the room.

"I hear you know alchemy well enough to not need a transmutation circles so I'm afraid I can't untie you." The woman said pacing around him.

"Are you afraid I'll run away?" Alphonse asked coyly.

"Are you trying to tell me you aren't afraid?" The woman asked smiling.

"You aren't going to hurt me right?" Alphonse asked in an up beat tone.

"Maybe a little." The woman grinned. "Scared yet?"

"No. Are you?" Alphonse replied flirtatiously.

Natalie laughed again as she slowly paced around the chair until she was behind him. Wrapping his hair around hand she gave it a hard yank pulling his head back. Leaning down she still wore a smile as she spoke. "Now why would I be afraid? I'm not the one all tied up. I could torture you to death if I felt like it."

"Even if that is what you decide to do what about before that?"

An evil smile came across Natalie's face. "Just don't start crying. That's annoying."

Edward stood outside of Mustang's door five minutes early. He was ordered to be there at three o'clock sharp and he had no intentions of arriving early. _"Awe the hell with it,"_ Edward thought flinging open the door and barging into the office. Mustang had his head down obviously sleeping until the door suddenly opened startling him.

"What the hell?" Mustang uttered popping up knocking a stack of papers on the floor as he was jolted out his nap. "Are you that anxious for a reprimand?" Mustang asked angrily as he restacked the papers he had knocked off his desk when he woke up.

"What do you want me to do now?" Edward asked irritated.

"The first thing you can do is tell me what brought on the sudden change in gender."

"This wasn't my choice okay? The bastards underground did this too me."

"And how pray tell were they able to get their hands on a feisty little runt such as yourself?"

Edward nearly popped a vein at being called a small twice in once sentence. He would have thrashed Mustang on the spot if it didn't mean big trouble for him and his brother later on. "Are you making fun at the fact I was captured and used a guinea pig?"

"No, I would never do anything like that." Mustang said seriously. "I'm making fun of the fact you screwed up and turned yourself into a woman." Mustang said unable to contain is laughter any longer. "What's even funnier is that you thought I'd buy a dumb story like that." Mustang said as he continued to laugh.

"Okay, so I'm not an expert liar like you, but my brother is free and that's what counts."

"So you're telling me you are going to live the rest of your life in that body?" Mustang asked seriously. Edward gave no response, but he could tell by the look in Edward's eyes that he was going to do everything in his power not to. "Just don't get caught okay? I don't want to be the one to throw you in prison for performing an illegal transmutation. Here is your next assignment." He said handing Edward a folder.

Skimming over mission details Edward's eyes grew large. "You're sending me to Rush Valley?"

"Yes, and once you're finished there you can do whatever you want. With things so slow lately you probably won't have another mission for months unless this one turns out to be something bigger. Is that a problem?"

"No sir." Edward said in an unenthusiastic tone.

"Good. Dismissed," Mustang said returning to his paperwork.

Edward left Mustang's office downcast. He wanted to get the assignment over with as soon as possible. The mission was to look into the rumors concerning chimera sightings in the city during the past month. Edward hoped it was just some idiot alchemist and nothing like the trouble they experienced with the homunculi. When he arrived at the library Alphonse was nowhere to be found and figured he had returned to their hotel room, but he wasn't there either. Normally Edward would be annoyed that he wasn't able to find his brother, but for some reason he had a bad feeling. Alphonse was usually close by or at least able to be found when he knew they were likely to be on the road again. Leaving the hotel Edward was going to check the park to see if Alphonse was there feeding the birds or something and other places he had found him feeding or attempting to abduct stray animals. His heart nearly jumped out of his throat when a military car came to a screeching halt as it pulled up to the curb beside him.

"Get in." Mustang ordered opening the back door. From the looks on everyone's faces it must have been serious so Edward asked no questions or made any hesitation to get into the vehicle beside Mustang. Hawkeye sat on the other side of him and up front driving to Edward's surprise was Armstrong and beside him sat a quiet Denny Brosh.

"What's going on?" Edward finally asked.

"It seems your brother has been kidnapped again." Mustang informed.

"Wha-?" Edward said suddenly feeling his insides catch fire.

"He was to meet me at the train station a half hour ago." Armstrong said.

_"He was supposed to what? Why didn't he tell me he was supposed to be meeting Armstrong today? More importantly why was he meeting Armstrong?" _Edward thought becoming even more upset than he already was. "How did you guys find out he was kidnapped?

"I saw the men that took him." Brosh said finally speaking. "I was out riding my bike and saw two men dressed in black shoving a boy into black limousine. At first I though it was you from how he was dressed, but I guess I was obviously mistaken. What happened to you Ed?" Brosh said turning around to get a better look at the teenager to make sure he wasn't seeing things.

Edward could feel a vein in his forehead popping. "Never mind about what happened to me just finish telling me what happened to my brother!" Mustang couldn't help but snicker at Edward's unruly anger even though he was trying not to.

Turning to face forward a slight frown crossed Brosh's face for a second before he continued on with his story. "They took him to a mansion just outside the city. From the looks of things they're some kind of organized crime syndicate."

"Not just any crime syndicate." Mustang chimed in. "They just might be the ones behind the-."

"Sir!" Hawkeye spoke up interrupting Mustang who had almost revealed a most troubling fact behind Alphonse's abduction. In the past few months young men between the ages of seven and thirteen had been kidnapped between there and Central and would show up a few days later in their home towns. Upon questioning the victims would clam up, start crying or both making it impossible to track down who ever was responsible for the kidnappings. Only one boy was willing to speak about what happened to him and due to his story they could only assume that the other abducted children were molested as well, that was if the boy was telling the truth. Everyone firmly believed the boy was making up the beautiful woman because he was too ashamed to admit that the men who nabbed him were the molesters, especially since when his mother took him to the hospital for a routine examination he wouldn't let the male doctor anywhere near him.

"I won't bore you with the details, but this syndicate has been causing a lot of problems lately." Mustang said so not to arouse suspicion.

"So, you're saying an anti military faction has my brother?" Edward asked becoming afraid for Alphonse's life. What if they found out he was a State Alchemist? Would they kill him right away as an example or would they try to use him?

"Don't worry, we'll get him back." Mustang said. He was very worried about Alphonse himself and was just hoping nothing had happened to him.

_"Why couldn't they have used a bigger car?" _Edward thought squirming slightly. Despite his worry and the seriousness of the situation Edward was none too pleased about being squished in the back seat beside Mustang and despite the straight face she wore Hawkeye was happy as a bug in a rug in her uncomfortable corner of the back seat. Mustang stuck in the middle was sweating nervously believing one of his worst nightmares had come true, being stuck between two women with no way out.

Once out on the country side Armstrong turned the car off road and into some bushes before bringing it to a stop. "Sorry about the bumpy ride." He side looking over his shoulder at the passengers in the back. Everyone had ended up popping out of place as while the car jumped along the bumpy terrain. Mustang had ended up smacking his head on the roof of the car and so had Edward who basically found himself in mid air for a second as the car rolled along off road and lay dizzily across Mustang's lap feeling as if he would vomit. Hawkeye had managed to stay in place by grabbing onto Mustang's arm. She sat with her face buried in his shoulder for moment before straightening up and asking if everyone was alright.

"I'm fine." Mustang grumbled rubbing his head.

"I'm used to it." Brosh replied. Armstrong looked his way with a raised eyebrow. "Oh, look a bird." Brosh said in attempt to draw attention away from himself.

"Get a hold of yourself, Fullmetal." Mustang ordered, but Edward didn't respond. Pulling him up the general gave his shoulders a good shake. "Snap out of it already." Mustang said sounding much angrier than he actually was.

Edward could hear the man yelling at him but he couldn't do anything about it his entire body felt like jelly. Loosing consciousness his body went completely limp. "Edward, wake up now! You're brother is depending you! This is no time to slack off!" Mustang continued to bark orders not knowing what else to do.

"Pass her to me." Hawkeye said and Mustang handed her the unconscious teen over faster than anyone could blink. "She's unconscious." Hawkeye said stating the obvious before smacking Edward and other than leaving a red mark on his face Hawkeye's heavy-handed slap did nothing.

"We'll just have to leave her." Mustang said opening the door.

"All by herself sir," Brosh asked not thinking it would be a good idea to do so.

"If you're concerned then you can stay behind and baby-sit." Mustang said as he got out the car.

"Hmm, I agree. I am not comfortable with leaving Ms. Elric here alone in her present condition. Look after her while we retrieve Alphonse." Armstrong said getting out of the car.

"Yes, sir." Brosh replied then sighed. He really had his heart set on helping out with the rescue of the younger Elric.

Hawkeye carefully positioned Edward on his back before going to the trunk of the car and pulling out a vest loaded with bullets and a shot gun.

"The mansion is right on the other side of that hill. Which will make our mission a little more complicated since they'll see us coming so me and General Mustang will go first." Armstrong informed.

"We're counting on you to watch our backs." Mustang added and Hawkeye nodded with a determined look in her eyes. It shouldn't be that difficult for them to over take gangsters, but one could never be too careful.

As Armstrong and company were starting their assault on the mansion as Alphonse was tearing down the hallway looking for an exit. Natalie had gotten a bit too carried away and untied him. The more he ventured into the mansion the more he felt as if he were in a mad house. One door he opened just as someone was getting shot in the head and the one after that lead into a ballroom where people were having dinner and being entertained by a live band. Alphonse sweat dropped and closed the door and started running again as he was still being perused by One, Two, Three, and the men who just offed the other guy. Turning a corner Alphonse stopped in his tracks as the wall started to glow and crack suddenly breaking apart and falling on top of him.

"Alphonse Elric, we are here to save you!" Armstrong declared flexing his muscles as he struck a pose. The men chasing Alphonse came to a dead halt as they beheld the Strong Arm Alchemist. Without further words Armstrong punched the ground causing it to ripple and rise knocking the gangsters off their feet and unconscious.

"Colonel," came a muffled moan from under the rubble.

"Alphonse Elric? Is that you?" Armstrong called looking around

"Here, I'm under here!" Alphonse called.

"Looking down Armstrong realized the sound was coming from below his feet and immediately started digging.

"Have you found him yet?" Mustang asked snapping his fingers and crispifying about fifty armed gangsters as Hawkeye shot the ones that got away. The reply was Alphonse groaning his head and arms uncovered. His eyes were swirling from lack of oxygen and pain.

"There you are! We have found you!" Armstrong said yanking him from the rubble and wrapping him in a bone crushing hug.

"AAAAAAAAAAAGH! Colonel please let me go!" Alphonse pleaded his arms flailing in the air as he struggled to get free.

"Maybe it's a good thing I was left behind." Brosh said out loud as he listened to the explosions and noises of what sounded like a small war going on.

Moaning Edward sat up. "Alphonse!"

"Woah, take it easy. Brosh said turning around. "Colonel Armstrong and everyone have already gone to rescue your brother." Brosh said as another explosion sounded. "And from the sound of things they should be back soon."

"I'm going." Edward said jumping out of the car.

"Edward wait!" Brosh said chasing after him.

Alphonse sat on the ground panting heavily. Reaching behind his head he pulled his pony tail loose letting his hair fall over his shoulder.

"AL!" Edward yelled seeing him on the ground a small distance away. In no time Edward was kneeling on the ground beside him. "Are you okay?" He asked relieved to see his brother in one piece.

"I'm fine." Alphonse assured.

"How could you let yourself get kidnapped like that? Did they do anything to you?"

Alphonse's turned away as he felt his face grow hot. "I'm sorry." Was all he could bring himself to say as military police by the dozens rushed by.

After speaking with Armstrong Alphonse sat nervously in Mustang's office who was peering over at him, impatiently tapping his fingers on the clean desk top.

"Did you want to talk about what happened in the mansion?"

"There's nothing really to say, sir."

"Oh?" Mustang said taking a sip of water. "That's not what Natalie had to say." Alphonse's face turned a deep red. "I hadn't even started the interrogation good before the woman confessed every little detail of her exploits to me."

The day before;

Mustang looked at the dark haired woman across the table from him with contempt. "We can do this the easy way or the hard wa-"

"Okay I'll tell you everything!" Natalie interrupted bawling like a baby.

Mustang sighed and after all the trouble he went through preparing a threatening speech she just confessed everything to him on the spot.

Alphonse sat in silence feeling as if the air in the room had become sparse. _"I think I'm going to be sick." _He thought as Mustang repeated everything Natalie had told him about her encounter with him.

"So, is what she said true? Did all those things actually happen?"

"I, um… My brother is waiting for me." Alphonse said getting up and running out of the office.

To Be Continued

**Author's Note**: Natalie and her henchmen One, Two and Three are a parody of a Nagisa Tezuka and her lackeys from Koko wa Greenwood. (Here Is Greeenwood). Nagisa is a bastard, but is always good for a laugh and the best villain in the series. I was going for a mirror effect with Natalie, but I think she ended up coming out a bit more sinister than Nagisa.

Now on to the questions;

**Ellen Tee** wants to know: "Does Ed love Al?"

**Answer**: Nani? What do you mean? I thought the answer to that question was obvious.


	13. Chapter 13

Equivalent Trade: When Alchemy Goes Terribly Wrong

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter 13

Edward and Alphonse stood idly on a busy street corner in Rush Valley. Alphonse was dressed in lightweight dark brown coat with a matching wide brim hat to conceal his identity. "Brother, I feel weird dressed like this. Even if we did run into Winry I doubt she'd recognize me." Alphonse said pushing his hair out of his face as hot breeze blew. "And it's hot under here." He complained.

"Stop whining." Edward chuckled. "We can't risk it."

"Then why don't you wear a disguise too, Brother?"

"I already have a perfect one." Edward said using his thumb to point at his chest.

Alphonse gave him a critical look. "With that braid and that outfit, even without the coat, she still may recognize you from behind. At least take your hair down."

Edward huffed. "Fine." He said quickly undoing the braid and letting his hair fall loosely around his shoulders. "Are you happy now?" Edward asked angrily then turned his attention to a group of men who were gawking at him. "Quit staring at me!" He barked and the men quickly went about their business.

_"Brother really does look more feminine with his hair down." _Alphonse thought miserably. _"I don't think I can ever get used to seeing him like this. I wonder if that's how he felt about me all those years?"_

"Well first things first, let's eat!" Edward said happily.

"But, we don't even have a place to stay for the night." Alphonse pointed out.

"Oh, right, you take care of that." Edward said running off.

"Brother…" Alphonse grumbled as he turned and started heading in the direction of the hotel

After getting a room and walking around for a bit Alphonse decided to go find Edward. He was a little hungry earlier, but found that feeling had disappeared. _"When my body was trapped in the gate Edward ate and slept a lot and even now he does that. We always thought it was because he was sustaining my body. It was only a theory, however, I can't help but feel it's true. I never come close to finishing what I'm eating but Edward eats enough for the both of us. Now that he faints so much on top of the oversleeping I still find myself up late at night half the time. I guess when our bodies crossed in the gate even after Brother restored me we're still intertwined. It makes me feel like a leech, but with that being true I can relax just a little knowing that the body my brother is walking around in is his own. We just have to find a way to change him back." _Alphonse was so deep in thought he didn't see the person in front of him carrying a huge wooden box and crashed right into them.

Alphonse lay on the ground along with half assembled pieces of automail. As his vision came back into focus he could see someone leaning over him.

"Hey, are you alright?" The person asked the voice sounding a little too familiar to Alphonse for comfort.

_"Winry!" _Alphonse thought nearly going into a panic. He quickly sat up.

"Take it easy. You hit your head pretty hard on the pavement." Winry said with only a slight edge of concern in her voice. _"Wow, he's kind of cute. I'm sure I have never met him before, but he looks so familiar to me for some reason." _

"What happened?" Alphonse asked looking at her.

_"H-he, sounds like Alphonse, but it can't be. If Al was restored then I'm sure they would have contacted me or grandma. It's been months since I last saw them. It really pisses me off, but they've never kept in touch. The only reason they bothered making contact with us after three years was because Ed needed his automail repaired. That's how it is with them so I guess I shouldn't be so angry. I miss them and now this jerk who sounds so much like Al crashes into me." _Winry thought as tears began to fall from her eyes. "You crashed into me and now my automail…" Winry said unable to keep herself from crying.

"Oh! I'm sorry." Alphonse said hurriedly gathering the automail and carefully placing it back into the crate.

"No it's not that. You just remind me of a close friend of mine.

Alphonse was dumbfounded. _"She really does remember me._

"Al, what are you doing sitting on the ground?" Edward questioned as he approached them. "And who the hell-" Edward was about to start screaming when he recognized the girl.

_"Ed?"_ Winry thought hearing the familiar voice, her eyes becoming large. Quickly she turned around and jumped up to hug him and as she did a strange look came over her face when she felt an uncomfortable bulge between them. _"What?" _Winry thought giving Edward two quick squeezes.

Edward's face turned red and put her at arms length. "Do you mind?" He said looking away from her.

"Oh, I'm sorry I thought you were someone else." Winry said apologetically feeling extremely embarrassed. _"That's obviously a girl you moron and Ed's a boy."_

Edward's face turned another shade of red.

_"Brother?" _Alphonse thought looking at him.

"Go ahead and tell her." Edward growled.

_"What? Tell me what?" _Winry thought thinking it strange two strangers would have something important to say to her. She looked at them quizzically.

"It's us, Winry." Alphonse said.

"Wha…" Winry uttered in disbelief.

"It's me Alph-." Before he could finish his sentence Winry had wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug.

"Al, I'm so happy for you!" She said as she continued to hug him. "And you're taller than Ed is too!" She said finding she had to tilt her head slightly upward to look at him.

_"That maybe true but if I take my shoes off I'm pretty sure I won't be as talk as you are." _Alphonse thought sweat dropping at Winry's comment. The younger of the two siblings definitely was taller, but Alphonse was still rather short.

Edward stood behind them fuming.

"Ed!" Winry said turning to hug him once again then stopped short bringing her hands to rest on his shoulders not wanting to repeat the uncomfortable action again. "What are those?" Winry asked looking down at his chest suspiciously. _"I've always thought Ed was a little strange, but this takes the cake."_

"Are you that dumb?" Edward said still red faced as he avoided making eye contact with her.

"Well they look and feel real enough." Winry said touching his chest with both of her hands.

"STOP THAT!" Edward boomed smacking her hands away.

"Why so uppity about me touching your fakes?" Winry asked her face red as well from anger.

"They're not fakes." Alphonse answered with tears hanging from his eyes. "Brother turned himself into a woman trying to restore me."

"Oh, Ed I'm-."

"Save it. I don't need you feeling sorry for me." Edward said as he walked past her.

_"I don't believe him!" _Winry quickly ran in front of him and smacked him. "Do you like being a woman? Is that it?" She roared.

"It's none of your business you stupid machine geek!" Edward roared back.

"None of my business? My best friend never calls or speaks to me unless he needs something and now I find he has turned himself into a girl and… I hate to disappoint you but I actually do care you know! Maybe it is none of my business but I thought we were closer than that." Winry said calming down.

Edward's eyes narrowed and he grabbed her hand pressing it against his right arm. "Do you feel that? Do you feel that Winry? It's a real arm. And this." Edward said yanking her to the ground.

"Brother." Alphonse said growing concerned.

"Stay out of this Al." Edward quickly warned before turning his attention back to Winry as he pressed her hand against his left leg. "That's flesh too." He said glaring down at her and dropping her hand. "You don't have to worry about me coming around or calling only when I need something anymore. Scream, cry, shout, hit me with that damn wretch of yours if you want, but don't expect me to care." Edward said coldly as he stalked away.

_"Why does he have to be so mean?"_ Winry thought as tears started to form in her eyes.

"Don't cry, WInry." Alphonse said leaning over her shoulder and helping her to her feet. "I think you just hurt his feeling that's all."

"Hurt Ed's feelings, me? Yeah right." Winry said turning her head away as she wiped a tear from her eye.

"Winry you don't have to cry for us. We've do enough of that ourselves. Brother isn't angry with you, he's sad. We just wanted you to be happy for once when you saw us." Alphonse said trying to comfort her. _"That's why we try not to come around or bother you and grandma Pinako unless we have to. It's hard looking into your eyes and seeing sadness when you look at us. Still, it seems all we've managed to have done is upset you even more."_ Suddenly Alphonse felt something metallic connect with skull.

"You dummy! You're both so dumb!" Winry said smacking him once more with her wrench. "You never write, you never call and to think that the very sight of you makes me sad… IT'S THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD!"

"Winry…" Alphonse said wide eyed.

"I love you! I love you both like family, so yes it hurts me to see you in pain, but I'm never sad to see you." Winry said as she continued to cry more so because her feelings were hurt. _"After all this time they still don't get it. After all this time I'm still on the outside looking in. When are they ever going include me? I know I can't be of any use to them, especially now that Ed doesn't need automail anymore, but I at least would like to know what's going on with them." _ Winry thought not realizing she was still sobbing.

"We love you too Winry." Alphonse said hugging her. "We just don't want to upset you with our problems." He said soothingly. _"They seem to never end and we can barely stand the burden ourselves."_

"I'm not a baby or some weakling that needs to be protected and sheltered from reality, Alphonse. You and Ed, you and Edward need to realize that the people who love you want to be there for you even if all we can do is cheer you on from the sidelines. At least give us that privilege. Stop shutting everyone out; stop shutting me out!" The words that came out she had been reluctant to say wondering if they were best left unsaid leaving her feeling of inadequacy hidden, but once they were said and she knew that at least one of the brothers had heard them she felt as if a huge weight was lifted from her chest.

Alphonse sighed. Neither him nor Edward were looking to make her feel like an out cast, but there were things they just couldn't communicate to her and even if they could put those things to words they new no matter how hard she tried she wouldn't understand. "We're sorry, Winry." Was all he could manage to say as he held her.

"Hey you two get a room!" Some random person shouted.

Winry looked up her eyes ablaze she turned in the direction the shouting was coming from and yelled back. "Can't you see there's nothing like that going on here, you moron!"

"Didn't look like nothing to me." Winry heard a woman murmur.

"Me neither." Came another random voice.

Winry looked around to see a crowd of people staring at them. _"These people, there's something wrong with all of them!" _Winry thought as she grabbed Alphonse's wrist pulling him away. "Come see my new shop!" She said in an up beat tone as a smile crossed her face. "It's not actually _my_ shop but I work there. Mr. Garfield just had the place remodeled. It looks awesome you have to come and see it!" She said excitedly as she practically dragged him down the street.

"Mr. Garfield I'm back!" Winry called to her boss who was in the back of the shop.

A heavy set man poked his head out of an open door. "Oh, and you've brought more business?"

"No, this is my friend Alphonse."

"And what a lovely person you're friend is." Garfield said sending chills up Alphonse's spine.

"I better go find my brother." Alphonse said trying to run off, but Winry grabbed him by the collar and slammed him down onto the floor.

"Just relax. I haven't showed you the shop yet."

"Ah, yes with the business this one brings here I was able to fix up the place. Do you like Winry's friend?"

"Yeah, it looks fine." Alphonse said sweat dropping and taking a step back. Garfield was only centimeters from his face.

"Hey, Winry I didn't get you anything for your birthday last year." Alphonse said hopping behind her. Garfield was good at his job, but he had a reputation for being a pervert and it was those perverted looks he kept shooting Alphonse that was creeping him out. Bringing up Winry's birthday was just a good excuse for leaving without worrying about Winry forcing him to stay.

"What are you talking about yes you…. That's right you didn't!" Winry said angrily.

"Or the year before that or the year before that-"

"Enough! Just buy me things already." Winry interrupted as she pushed him out the door. _"I never really thought about it, but ever since they left for Central that day they haven't even called to wish me a happy birthday forget about presents. I wonder how much money he has on him. It doesn't matter I'm going to bleed him 'til he cries." _Winry thought evilly as she walked down the street with Alphonse.

To Be Continued


End file.
